From the mountainside, streams descend,
Mysterious origins, like magic, they extend.
A spot of wonder, a triangle's grace,
Where the river flows, adding intrigue to this place.
Colossal rocks rise amidst the flow,
Dividing the river, a mesmerizing show.
Transcending infinity, their presence profound,
Unifying waters, in eternal harmony they're bound.
Compelled by the river's ceaseless sway,
We disembark, immersed in vibrant display.
I reach out, feeling water's chilling embrace,
Beneath the surface, pebbles hold secrets, an unseen space.
Shallowness reveals treasures, waiting to be found,
Yet, my imagination delves deeper, unbound.
Unveiling mysteries that lie beneath,
A realm of enchantment, where dreams bequeath.
In that moment, a longing stirs deep inside,
To stay, leave behind, let the world subside.
Nature's symphony enfolds, whispers in the air,
Acknowledging the love that blossoms, rare.
"You have fallen for me, reluctant to part,"
The water murmurs, stirring emotions in my heart.
Bound by a connection, profound and true,
In nature's embrace, finding solace, anew.
-
Author:
Radiant Reflections (Pseudonym) (
Offline) - Published: May 29th, 2023 18:15
- Comment from author about the poem: Outside our tempo traveler, a mesmerizing scene unfolded. The mountains were adorned with clouds, as if they embraced them in a gentle hug. Streams cascaded down the mountainside, their origin shrouded in mystery, as if born from a touch of magic. One particular spot revealed a triangular formation, where the river flowed down, adding a touch of intrigue to the enchanting scenery.
- Category: Nature
- Views: 5
Offline)
Comments1
My comments on the poem "Rendezvousing River” by Reflections Corporate Training Hub
From your writings, you sure have the skills to write poetry. Your rhyming is very good and you do have a large vocabulary. You know how to express in poetry scenes of nature that come your way.
However, as a friend and fellow-poet, may I kindly point out that in the last two stanzas, there is a slight lapse in the rhyming :
“air” does not rhyme well with “rare”
“true” does not rhyme well with “anew”
Please fefer to the following :
“RHYME. When words have the same vowel sound and end with the same consonant sound, they are said to RHYME. Eg : snow, low; cease, please. Rhyme makes the verse more musical, by giving it pleasing sounds. It also preserves the verse form by marking the ends of lines. (…)”
WREN & MARTIN : "HIGH SCHOOL ENGLISH GRAMMAR AND COMPOSITION." (REVISED BY PRASADA RAO). NEW DELHI : S. CHAND & CO., 1994. (REPRINTED 1994). (Pages : 399 - 415).
Full acknowledgements are made to the authors, publishers and rights-holders.
On the whole the poem is excellent. Rhyming is NOT everything. It is the poem itself that counts. Still, one must be aware of rhyming rules.
Best wishes, kind friend.
Today I have posted my poem “Buy one, get one free…” on this site.
Note that I myself do NOT always write excellent rhymes in my poetry.
Soman Ragavan. 30 May, 2023. //
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