I Love You Poem, by Jal, at My poetic side

Will you miss me when I am gone?
Will you reminisce on times long forgotten?
And would you hold my memory so strong?
Or leave it behind in a sea of nothing

Nothing, I am nothing
I don't even deserve your smile
Still yet, I ask for pity
Don't forget me when I am gone
Please don't

Remember me for someone I could've been
As someone who had much to give
A dying light with life yet to see
A tortured soul ascended towards reprieve

Know that I will always love you
And I care for you
You are the shining star to my sky
The radiant sun to my eyes
The joy in otherwise
A rotten life
I love you
Even if you don't love me
Or care
Even if my memory hurts you
Just know that I love you
I love you

Nothing, I am nothing
I am but a fragile flicker
Its not how I want you to remember
I wish I could be more
I wish

I could've been someone different
Taken more initiative
Used my fucking head
Instead I am all that's left here

Maybe I would've made you proud
Avoided all this mental turmoil
My failures echo much too loud
I'm a failure
I'm a failure

But
Just know
That no matter what I will love you
And I will always care for you
Even if I am not here anymore
No matter where I go
Even if the waters swallow me whole
Or if my life seeps from self-inflicted hole
I won't stand this hurt no more
I will always love you
And care for you
Even if I am just a dying memory
A song no one will sing
A dull little memory
A fleeting memory
Just know that I love you
I will always love you
I love you

Author: Jal ( Offline)
Published: July 3rd, 2023 00:54
Comment from author about the poem: I quick little disclaimer, despite what this little poem of mine says, this is not in any form a suicide note or anything of the like. This was more so just something I came up with in an attempt to get more raw with my own emotions. And I guess a way for me to write down a sort of fear of mine? Would it really be a fear? I am not too sure. Memories are fragile, life is short. Maybe I will find myself in a situation where I check out of life a bit too early. Should that ever happen, I don't want my family or friends to be left with nothing. If that ever was to become true, maybe then they would find this poem. I put my loved ones on such a high pedestal. Such a mountainous level that I don't even see myself anywhere in the equation. I don't think I deserve to even be loved. But those I treasure do. They mean so much to me. I don't know how they feel about me, or what their honest opinions are, but I just hope they see something good. Something I can't see. Maybe if I could just learn to love myself, yeah? Wouldn't that be something. Life continues on, and so do I. Allow this poem to just be a less destructive way to deal with my unresolved issues.
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