When One is No Longer
When I think of you
as indeed, I do often ..
You feel
so very much alive ..
But then,
you are no longer ..
And so,
when I try to think
of you harder ..
As indeed, I so want
to do ..
You are no more
the carefree
young woman, I once
used to know ..
But rather the ghost
of all those
women I have ever wanted ..
-
Author:
Neville (
Offline) - Published: July 4th, 2023 00:38
- Comment from author about the poem: when truth matters more than the love it leaves behind .. please dont be gentle with me ..
- Category: Unclassified
- Views: 33
- Users favorite of this poem: Jerry Reynolds, Garth Rakumakoe.
Offline)
Comments12
the ghost
of all those
women I have ever wanted .‘
Those are really sad lines ..
Sad writing but well expressed
I am glad you noticed the sadness I attempted to thread throughout .. many thanks Violet b (used to be yellow rose) .. You are a ⭐.. Neville
Yes , I did .. and it’s never nice or easy to feel so much sadness ( wherever it might be coming from )
Your welcome )
I found the iteration of the word indeed very interesting in this piece-There is depth to the content in the simple and ‘care free’ wording-we do detach to survive the grief from loss-also the idol worshiping of humans, especially a woman, will lose their luster as the last seven lines eluded and we can become disengaged from the feelings we once had for the person-you are mastering the enigma of this piece-Of course I am commenting the implicit meaning-appealing work as always poet friend…
wow .. what a well reasoned and in depth gift you have left for me this mane my friend .. thank you ever so muchly and kindly .. Neville 🌷
One day that ghost may be with you in reality Neville and all will be wonderful.
Andy
bloomin hope so Andy .. your optimism reinforces my own belief .. Neville
I avoid to dream
Of what might have been.
if you can do that I applaud you
It's a challenge!
Good write Neville. KP said to me ages ago 'You can no longer sing', but I carry on warbling regardless! lol.
Oh' is that what it is Mr. O ...🐭
I of course am un-cultured to give such a well reasoned and in depth comment as is above! lol.
I dunno, maybe you are just, or simply write 🐭..🐧))
Wonderfully written...one day I think you will find yourself at peace with that "ghost" and you will be together again....C
what an absolutely delightful thought .. many thanks C ... N 🙂
Beautiful dear Neville 💐 ❤️
thank you dear Teddy 🙂 ❤️
Great write Neville.
thank you so much Jez ..
I read this poem aloud several times, and each time the sense of yearning became more palpable. Beautifully expressed and lovingly written dear friend.
I am so glad you were passing Bella, what an honour you have bestowed upon both me and my latest little scribble .. I can hardly thank you enough my friend ... Neville
This poems literally turns inside out in meaning and metaphor. A brilliant piece of work, Neville.
way too kind Garth but I aint complaining kind sir .. many thanks indeed 🙂
immersed in our woes and laments
we even manage to make the hurt
we dish out, all bout us...
fallible, cursed to view the world
through our biased eyes
and yet, some of us still struggle
to find a line
between what, we could have been
and what we may yet, become
thus, as hard as it may be
we peel back those duck-tapes
barricading our past mistakes
and boldly, excavate
the lessons we've learnt, insuring
we're accountable
for the broken heart's we've left
in our wake
thanks for checking in brother Mek .. N
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