A fool

I’ve always been more a fool than a boy

Or maybe those just go together when you’re me

Either way I became a fool for poetry november 10th 2019

I started writing

The world became my muse,

i was so obsessed.

i covered my desk in scrawled notes

things I wrote.

i didn’t have many friends back then

but I don’t remember minding

i had my poetry

the words I wrote down daily.

but I never thought of myself as a poet

No, I was just myself

i wrote poems nearly daily. 
And for the past 2 years since we met

Nearly all those poems have been about you

you told me once

long ago

you loved me more than music

And I told you in return

i loved you more than the stars in the sky

It was crazy. That you were all that was on my mind

I missed you I adored you 

and I wrote you down every word

I became a fool for you March 4th 2022

And I loved you as I was undone

And I hate myself

because I would have given up all my poems

to you

I must have written a thousand by now

id have scraped the words clean from my soul

i burnt my books to burn away your cold.

i told you once

Long ago

that I loved you more than the stars in the sky 

but it was a lie

because I loved you more than my poetry

I loved you more than

i loved me

I loved you enough to want to hand you the world if I could

And the craziest part, 

the craziest part is that I still would

These words have been my only comfort at night

They’re where I go late at night

they make me something. 
they make me, me

But if I could trade them all, 

for your love again

I’d be too weak to say no

I’d be to slow to refuse

I’d be to helpless to think again.

but of course it would never work out like that

I’d want you

but we’d still be our worst

because we didn’t fit

we never fit

we didn’t work out

we never could

And you just noticed first 

I loved you more than the stars in the sky

i loved you more than poetry

but that’s how people like us end

because I loved you more

 

more than my poetry