Burning Ocean

Most of my life I’ve been living in sorrow

A lot of time I feel like my soul is just a blessing I borrow,

 

A sense of emptiness sweeps around the memories in my brain like a gust of wind

Yet an alternate being, like a devil in my body, can’t help but grin,

 

Fighting through my last breaths I picture my hatred for the world and all of my suffering

I reach for the sun, slipping through my grasp, as I fall deep past the surface of flames

These flames suffocate my soul but I don’t feel any pain, nor do I feel a slither of shame

I wonder if from the start my soul was never mine to claim,

 

As I approach my final thoughts I wonder why I always lived my life in vain

The demons that lurked in my thoughts were just something that I couldn’t tame

I’m falling so deep past the surface that I couldn’t even see the rain

Yet I still feel the sensation of my heart trapped in a wild flame,

 

My life was a game of hide and seek but I never found myself

Maybe things would’ve gone better if I asked for help

Denial of feeling left me numb and afraid

Now I think I’m feeling the weight of all my pain and my shame,

As I continued to fall into the depths of my sorrow

I thought about what it would be like to live another day and see tomorrow,

 

All of my emotions, that for years bubbled up inside of me, erupted as I watch the fire retreat from my body

All I could think was that I wanted to say sorry

To the people I hurt and the people I loved

I didn’t deserve the tears that washed over me like an old drug,

 

A sensation I hadn’t felt for centuries was hitting me with all of its might

I felt relaxed and that there was no longer a reason for me to fight,

 

As I’m engulfed into the darkness of the ocean I find myself no longer reaching for the light

I was at peace with my sins

I felt like I could finally ascend and take flight,

 

Before I closed my eyes I grinned back at the demon who left me with sorrow

I prey the soul I was gifted renewed and lives with the intent on seeing tomorrow.