Being a man

Whatever you do, you mustn't cry

It's a failure as a man to even ask why

Chin up and face life with a grin

Take everything thrown at you securely on the chin

Play football and learn martial arts

Drink pints on a weekend and get good at darts

Insecurity was invented for women and puffs

And politics are for university chuffs

If you want to succeed and earn lots of money

Play your cards close to your chest and keep being funny

If you have to feel then do it in your own time

Dumping this on your friends is a crime

There is no need at all for a personality it's true

It's ok to leave every interaction praying they like you

Ok so to recap

I suck it up 

Yes

Cards close to the chest

Yes

Never cry

Yes

If I feel bad I just lie?

Yes!

So every day is just a good day?

Yes, I went through this so you suffer my way.

This is just how it's been done since time began

You like Piers Morgan not fucking Rodin

Just keep going according to plan

A few simple steps and you too can be a man