Memories, inflamed

Can you already hear the shovels

Knocking on the lid above your face?

Infection spreads from corpse to living bodies

‘It hasn’t even started’, you may think

And then you take a step

The line you crossed

Appeared to be

The line of fire

The body’s shaking

The worst flu of your life

Is the futility of it

You envy men that don’t know how

Painfully

Muscles can shrink

And how nauseously cinder stinks

You will remember every second

But that you won’t admit

What scalds your brains from inside out

One day will get through skull

And slam the helmet

Do you recall inhabiting this skin before

That all have happened?

Do you recall the vows you gave?

To make a change

Once you get back

You never really got back, did you?

Those scars, those bruises, those concussions

Did you even get there?

The wound of yours has been contaminated

And you

Yourself

You got pernicious

But God

Maybe you always were

Now, can’t you see

There is something disarming even

When promises like those you gave

Consistently get broken

Memories get inflamed again

Almost civil, it is

Almost human, you are.