Happy Birthday

Happy birthday

Another year

Another day

With all this pain

Happy birthday

Another year

Another day

What a shame

Happy birthday to me

Never thought I’d make it to eighteen

There were times where I could never think that far into the future

Happy birthday to me

Finally reached adulthood

Which I never thought I would

Happy birthday to me

Nah fuck that

Let’s rewind, let’s retract

Let me take it back

Back to all those birthdays

Where I had more tears in my eyes

Then smiles on my face

Crying for multiple hours

Family didn’t know what was going on

Behind closed doors

Happy birthday they sang to me

Trying to create happy memories

But when they fell asleep

Is when all the negativity

Finally kicked in

Remembering

All the pain I had suffered

All the pain I was suffering with

Didn’t want to deal with this shit anymore

Just laying in bed

Not alone tho

Had all those voices that were inside my head

Kept me company on my birthday

Were talking to me more than my family

I remember one birthday

I wanted it to be my last day

Wanted all the pain to just fade away

Damn can’t believe I almost killed myself on my birthday

Happy birthday

Another year

Another day

With all this pain

Happy birthday

Another year

Another day

What a shame

Happy birthday to me

Never thought I’d make it to eighteen

There were times where I could never think that far into the future

Happy birthday to me

Finally reached adulthood

Which I never thought I would

Happy birthday to me

Nah fuck that

Let’s rewind, let’s retract

Let me take it back

Back to that birthday where I almost did it

Almost killed it

Almost took my last breath away

Almost had the same two dates

On my fucking grave

You don’t know how many times that day

Has played in the back of my mind

Consuming me from the inside

One of my darkest times

Fuck man

Being suicidal on your birthday

Hurts in the worst way

That’s supposed to be your day

But instead you want it to be your last day

Just thinking about it

Brings tears to my eyes

But nah I ain’t ever gonna cry

These thoughts

These voices

These memories

Have brought out enough tears from me

To last centuries

For the longest time, they were my worst enemies

Never left me alone

Not on the holidays

Not on test days

Not even on my birthdays

Happy birthday

Another year

Another day

With all this pain

Happy birthday

Another year

Another day

What a shame

Happy birthday to me

Never thought I’d make it to eighteen

There were times where I could never think that far into the future

Happy birthday to me

Finally reached adulthood

Which I never thought I would

Happy birthday to me

Nah fuck that

Let’s rewind, let’s retract

Even with all the pain

Never gonna take it back

Those days made me stronger

Those days shaped me

Into who I am today

Wouldn’t change that for anything

So you know what

Happy birthday to me

Finally made it to eighteen

And I’m the happiest I have ever been

So it’s time to celebrate

All of my achievements

All of my hard work

The hard work I put into myself

To better myself

To better my health

Now I’m living me best life

From now on, only positivity

So happy birthday to me