Disappearing Act

Is it bad to want to be forgotten?

For myself to be eradicated from other’s memories.

I don’t want them to remember me.

To remember my mistakes, or even my accomplishments.

I want to be translucent.

Someone you walk by and don’t even notice.

I want them to wonder whose contact it is in their phone.

I don’t want to be seen.

I have no craving to be a “main character.”

I am fine being the actor who is blurred the whole 2 minutes they are in the film.

I don’t want to exist.

Am I suicidal?

Maybe. Maybe not.

I just know I want to disappear.

Like a missing person, except no one knows I’m missing.

Do you understand?