Waiting for the Grown-ups

When I got up this morning there was water in the shower

and I thought: "How am I going to survive?"

First off, I called a plumber, but I waited for an hour

and I doubt that he's intending to arrive.

I tried a sticking plaster, but that was a disaster - 

it did not begin to mitigate the leak.

In fact, it seems the water is flowing even faster.

Am I going round the bend or up the creek?

I'm calling the insurance.  It's a test of my endurance.

I'm on hold - that means I'll have to wait for ever

and the bloody dreadful music simply makes me want to lose it.

How I wish that I was competent and clever.

When everything goes wrong, why aren't I big and strong

enough to deal with all the problems in my life?

Now I've got a sinking feeling water's coming through the ceiling.

I'm just waiting for the grown-ups to arrive.