Goodbye: I loved you but I am not sorry anymore

When we’re alone

you’re more genuine than anyone I’ve ever known.

When we’re around others

you’re somehow someone completely other

Some days I wish you would’ve stayed

Other days I wish you were far away

Some days I think I will never recover

Other days I think our friendship will be rediscovered

You’re two sides of the same coin at the same time

While I try to change myself for the better, one aspect at a time

You’re never happy with what you have

While I know you don’t even deserve that

I am hardworking

You’re not even willing to try your best

For me harmony and kindness are important

You think you’re above everyone else

I know so much about you

While you probably don’t even know my favourite subject

I thought we had the same beliefs

till I started looking closer

I tell you that I accomplished something

You tell me it isn’t that hard to do

It took me two months to forgive you after our fight

Forgiving my other friends usually takes a day

Because I know if I told them, it had hurt me

They would apologize and not do it again

I know you are that way because of where you grew up and how people treated you

But I also know that’s not an excuse

Now I finally ask myself,

How much did I hate myself to let me be treated this way?

Please reflect on how you treat people and communicate with them

Because it is hurtful

Please think before you talk about something that could be a sensible topic to some

Because it caused me to spiral into bad habits again

Please don’t talk about the fact that you have a thigh gap

Because I felt uncomfortable and insecure when I didn’t

Please don’t talk openly about your unhealthy eating habits

Because it can trigger people, and it made me think I should restrict how much I eat