Undertow of an unravelling utopic dream that
Persists in sucking me downward and spitting me up.
Indefinitely stuck in a torture chamber of my own demise,
Never being able to escape the thumb screw torment.
Smoking, toking the black vapor that others have been
Misting and mouth-ejecting very violently
Onto my sullied, seared, sun-weary soul,
Kindling, once again, the need for
Emergent yet elusive escape.
Another attempt to find my
Gratitude for glum, gloomy
Attitudes thrown at me in
Irreversible disdain for my
Never-ending self-sacrifice,
Without ever making
Inherently reasonable,
Totally understandable,
Hardly deniable sense.
Ontological otherness
Unleashes the useless
Temptations to hide.
Regret reels within
Existential tragedy
Abhorrently abetted,
Shockingly, by people
Only ever obfuscating
Naked-truth narratives.
© 2024 Tristan Robert Lange. All rights reserved.
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Author:
Tristan Robert Lange (
Offline) - Published: December 22nd, 2024 07:11
- Comment from author about the poem: This is both an acrostic and a shape poem, in the shape of a pipe/bowl.
- Category: Unclassified
- Views: 14
- Users favorite of this poem: Cheeky Missy, Teddy.15, aDarkerMind
Offline)
Comments8
Clever in shape and Accrostic as well as dealing with what is truth anyway. A most difficult topic and evoking emotion from his words. Nicely done
Thank you so much Soren! I am glad to know that this delivered for you and I am always grateful for your close reads and insightful analysis! 🙏🖤🐦⬛
I used to hate the smoking on buses. We see it outside work places now, thankfully restricted from indoors.
Meanwhile - I Have 'no reason' not to be ontological or obfuscating. Fido says, Woof, get the dictionary out cos you're talking rubbish again! lol.
You made me laugh out loud…again! Indeed tell Fido you get a pass. Here’s a bone🦴.LOL! As a matter of fact, Gibberish happens to be my primary language! 😂
I have enjoyed the read, but this one is making my little brain work overtime !!, nicely written
Indeed my muse has led mr into some experimental creations as of late! 😂🤣 Glad you enjoyed! I vary much appreciate your time and effort my friend! 🙏🖤🐦⬛
You are very welcome
Nice take on the idiom “up in smoke” powerfully expressed sense of being trapped in a cycle of despair and self-destruction. The vivid imagery and emotional depth highlight the struggle to find meaning and escape from the torment. This poem’s exploration of existential tragedy and the impact of others' actions adds a poignant layer to the narrative. Thrill to read. 👍🏻
I got the acrostic which was extremely well executed .. the pipe bowl in my good eye looked like half a Rorschach butterfly naked and wielding a machete in the direction of a hoard of advancing baguettes .. Nice one our Tristan .. 🧑🎄👍
LOL! Word wrap issues, or did someone poke you in your good eye? 🤣 Thank you, Neville. All jokes aside, I am truly thankful for you taking the time to read and comment on my poem. Much appreciated friend! 🙏🖤🐦⬛
This is so beautifully written on the Darkside of what bad dreams and indeed reality can feel like, no escaping the dark, love this dear Tristan powerful emotional and full of imagery 🌹
Thank you so much dear Teddy! I am truly glad the poem resonated and am thankful for your time, feedback and for favoriting it. Merry Christmas and a huge thank you, my friend! ❤️
don't know how I missed this one Tristan, but found it eventually.
a dark write at it's very best.
Yikes, how did I miss your comment, Melvin? My sincerest apologies. Glad you found the poem my friend and, in turn, I am glad I found your comment! 🤣 Thank you so much for your time and your support, my friend! ❤️🙏
Well a few of those words sent me on a googling spree! I quite like this tragic poem, it is very well written.
Hahaha! Sorry about that! 🤣 Glad you liked it, my friend! Thank you so much! ❤️🙏
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