Skin accordion folds, like time's wind swept waves
Rolling ripples, hold cobblestone age spots that his hide paves
Sagging flesh like falling breakers, beat on body's shore
Blue veins wrap and chain an aging slave inside century's door
Eroding mountain, slumping hills, its peak ringed with snow
Cliff ridges that white drifts fill overhang sunken placid pools below
Fingers stroll over deforested knoll, where hair fell long ago
Belly a bowl, legs a pole, eyes stare with foot prints of a crow
Hair peers from ears, cotton rammed in like wadding for musket balls
A blank stare, no one's there, deaf to any incoming calls
A gasping breeze, a wheeze, a sneeze, whispers from a flared nose cave
Under time buried, a rotting body bed ferried, to its waiting grave
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Author:
sorenbarrett (
Offline) - Published: May 28th, 2025 02:51
- Category: Unclassified
- Views: 64
- Users favorite of this poem: teardrop, Soman Ragavan, Poetic Licence, Friendship, Damaso, Libellule, Cheeky Missy, Teddy.15, Tristan Robert Lange
Offline)
Comments15
Getting old (I'm gonna say, "getting older" sure isn't as I was told. There is no gold in those golden years. You have penned this so perfectly!
Thank you so much for the read and supportive words they mean a great deal and are most appreciated.
You are very welcome. I very much enjoy reading your words.
You are so kind
This is amazing. I love the use of "adjectives" , It is so more pleasant to read a poem with adjectives.Rolling ripples and sagging flesh captures old age perfectly.Not really a perfect time of life.It can be hard work.A wonderful poemWell done.I enjoyed reading and had a laugh as well
Thank you David for your review and most kind words of support and encouragement. I guess I have the right to write about this without being called out for being politically incorrect in that I am one myself. Not sure why but self criticism always is considered acceptable.
As we get older, we become more contemplative, more philosophical. We ponder on the life gone through. The poem describes the body’s journey through life. In the final years, things start falling apart, for such is the ageing process.
The final line : “a rotting body bed ferried, to its waiting grave.”
Thus the body was rotting while still alive. The grave is waiting to gobble up.
“Since the day of my birth, my death began its walk. It is walking toward me, without hurrying.” – Jean Cocteau (1889-1963)
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Thank you Soman for your review of this poem and for your most understanding and supportive comment it is deeply appreciated.
The comparison of the aging body with natural landscapes is powerful and evocative. There's a quiet beauty in how you portray aging , even in decay. Well written!
Thank you so much Savia for your read and kind words they are always most appreciated and valued
You are very welcome!!!
Reading this I felt like I was looking in the mirror, some are lucky and grow old beautifully, the rest we grow old like this write, very enjoyable read
Thank you Tobani for your read and words of support they are most valued
You are very welcome
Oh that familiar terrain of aging! 🙏🏻🕊
Indeed Cryptic familiar and getting more so each day. Thanks for the review and support it is appreciated
Most welcome 🙏🏻🕊️
How did you know exactly what KP looks like at her current age? - erm, she's 35, so she says. lol. I said to her 'This is a poem about you, my dear, about the photo of yourself you gave to one of my poetry friends recently'. heehee.
Thanks Orchi appreciate the read and words of support. I was wondering who that picture was of. Found it in the mail with not return address. lol
Great job with this... such crisp details...
Thank you so much for the read and comment it is most important to me.
Superb imagery. You paint the scene well.
Thanks so much Thomas
lol hilarious 😂 🌹 I wonder what would happen if this poem was left in every plastic surgeons office in Beverley Hills lol love it and yes I'm growing old disgracefully the natural way. 🤗
Thanks so much Teddy for the read and the comment. Yes aging has its costs but still better than the alternative.
Very well written. Thank goodness it's about the parts that really don't count as we age. The growth of the mind and heart do.
Thank you so much for the read Hzugman it is most appreciated and valued. Yes insured only for the drive train the rest is out of pocket when the warranty is up.
What can be say that you haven't said here, Soren? So, I am just going to shut up, admire, and join that long list of faves! 🌹👏
Thank you so much Tristan your visits and words are always most appreciated.
You are most welcome, Soren!
A fine write, Soren. Nicely done.
Thank you Tom I appreciate the read and words of encouragement.
Yeh - a little bit like that....................................................................!
Thanks so much Dave you said it right I got bit like that.
My best friend is of an age I will never get.
Birthed she did but did she ever regret?
In old age I try to make amends as much as I am able.
Thank you so much for the review and comment it is always most appreciated.
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