Dads Jokes For Tomorrow.

Dad’s Jokes for Father’s Day.

I told my son he should not

Listen to losers.

Now he won’t listen to me.

Dentist: Your teeth are stained.

Do you smoke or drink coffee.

Me: I drink it.

My Uncle was crushed by a Piano.

His Funeral was very low key.

My Girlfriend says I’m way too

Condescending.

(That means I speak down to people).

I can’t believe someone broke into my

House and stole all of my fruit.

I am peachless.

There’s this new cryptocurrency

Called Decibel.

It’s a sound investment.

I have a friend who really hates living

In the centre of the USA.

She says she’s in a constant state of

Missouri.

Did you hear about the giant

With Diarrhoea?

It’s all over town.

My co-worker Celsius needed to take

Some time off, so they hired a guy called

Kelvin to cover for him.

He is the new temp.

What dating app do lumberjacks use?

Timber.

I have a fear of overly intricate

Buildings…

I suppose you could say I have

A complex complex complex.

What do the French call it when

Something sad happens on Thursday.

Un tra-jeudi.

I watched a documentary on how

Ships are kept together.

Riveting.

I said to the customer “So, You’d

Like a cheeseburger?

“Yes,” he said. “Well done”

“Thank you”, I said.

I just flew back from a

Transformers convention.

And boy, my arms are tyres.

Happy Father’s Day