The Wasp The Wasp;
Whats the Point of the Wasp?
It arrives every Summer at a Maddening cost.
The Picnic is planned like a Military Campaign,
Salad, Fruits and a little Champagne.
When out from the Skies like a Kamikaze of old:
A Squadron of Wasps with their Hell to unfold.
Panic sets in as the Swarm now invade;
Like a day-out in Egypt when God sent the Plaque.
So you're Swatting away like someone insane;
Like King Kong in that film being attacked by the Planes.
The Wasp The Wasp;
What's the point of the Wasp?
With the Girl of your Dreams you're out for a walk,
Then She whispers desires of a Sexual Sort.
Oh yes Virginia there is a Saint Nick,
All Birthdays at once so we'd better be quick.
And just at the point where you're getting Steamed-up;
Like 'Chatterley and Mellors' in that infamous Book;
Along comes a Wasp and he's brought all his friends;
And it's 'Coitus Interruptus' or much in that trend.
You both start to flee as the attack seems to grow,
And She's like Hedy Lamarr in that scene long ago.
There's Ramblers Ahoy so you now not alone;
And they getting it all on the Obligatory phone.
The Wasp The Wasp;
What's the point of the Wasp?
A Nudist Camp is the place to reside,
You can 'Air' your Opinions and much more besides,
A few Sets of Tennis and Badminton too;
But a Race featuring Hurdles would just never do.
So your playing away as Nature intends,
And a familiar Sound means it's time to defend;
For the Girls start to scream and the Gentleman Shout;
Much waving of Rackets and jumping about.
Then you all get to stagger to the Medical Bay,
It's a sight that Rubens was wont to display:
Ice Packs and Vinegar being applied to the flesh,
An X Rated ' Where's Wally' been taken to excess.
So I'll ask again what's the point of the Wasp;
If there is such a reason;
Well I'm really quite lost.
It can have no duty to Beast or Man,
So I ask Dear Lord:
Please tell us the Plan.
-
Author:
Kevin Hulme (Pseudonym) (
Offline)
- Published: July 1st, 2025 18:46
- Comment from author about the poem: Yes I know the Wasp is part of the Eco System or whatever. But that does not stop it being the Russell Brand of the Insect World and so annoying.
- Category: Humor
- Views: 11
- Users favorite of this poem: sorenbarrett, Cheeky Missy
Comments4
A fun read that gave me a smile. I have had my run ins in the past, been stung many times and also had several nests in my storage shed with whom I had a peaceful pact. I leave them alone and they don't bother me.
Up to now I've never been Stung at all. Apart from a few Con Artists coming to the door selling things. Thank you for Reading.
This, THIS is rich indeed!!!! Awesome! I love the exquisite connections throughout, skillfully turning the tale to purpose. I love it!!! Beautifully rendered with a driving, haunting poignancy. Thank you so much for sharing.
My Pleasure. As for Picnics, I knew that Suit of Armour would come in handy one day.
Thank you for your Comment and Reading.
A very entertaining and well written write about the irritating pest, enjoyed the read
Thank you for your message and Reading.
You are very welcome
Ah, what a riotous ride of a poem—satirical, irreverent, and gloriously exasperated. Perfect totem for Russell Brand!🕊️🙏🏻
Thank you for Reading and your comment.
And don't get me started on the Sloth. Get up and do something for Heaven's sake. Handstands, Juggling, anything.
Ah yes, the sloth! 🦥
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