Scars you chose not to see

I sang like fae, my voice desperate yet sweet to entertain your hellish wants.

I cleaned and scrubbed like Cinderella, gone before midnight so you could enjoy the comfort of a clean space,

Hidden like a rat you didn’t wish to see.

I ran and scrambled to meet your every requirement,

Dashing to meet your requirements,

Breaking my own spirit just to appease you.

Just because for once I wanted something.

All I wanted was one day, just one with my friends.

Even that was too great an ask.

Oh how much it must fatigue you to have to worry about your daughter, old enough to work so hard and run to the shops yet not to make her own decisions.

You’ve gutted me

Ripped my heart out and made me serve it as a meal just for your own delight.

Yet when you see the scars marring me, by my own hand yet by your push,

You will be shocked

Say you never saw it coming.

Then you didn’t see the light fade in my eyes.

The muffled sobs from my bedroom.

The small screeches in the bathroom.

The small bloodied razor blades hidden in boxes.

You didn’t care enough when you scarred my heart

You only care when other people can see those scars

When other people can judge