Reader advisory: This piece includes themes of suicide and grief.
No one loves a suicide.
Judgments come in
D
E
E
P and W I D E,
Delivering shame,
Stripping dignity,
Exasperating grief,
And robbing recovery.
Yet,
Everyone loves the game,
Not by name—
Though it’s always the same.
Pick your poison—
Coffee and tea,
A remedy for peace,
Provides high anxiety.
Have a little beer or wine—
Fine—if by a little one means
Once in a while, not all the time.
And the answer is yes,
Needing to have it every day
Is all the time.
Oh, and then there’s speed,
Not like caffeine,
But the kind found
On Route 80 anywhere USA.
Memorialized by flowered crosses.
No one loves a suicide,
Unless it is their’s to commit.
They judge and shun and
C
o
n
n
d
e
m
n
To hell.
Before ringing their own bell—
Seized, clogged,
Clutching their widow maker.
© 2025 Tristan Robert Lange. All rights reserved.
Tittu
-
Author:
Tristan Robert Lange (
Offline) - Published: July 30th, 2025 08:15
- Comment from author about the poem: This poem engages with a raw and potentially triggering subject. It is not meant to condone suicide, nor to retraumatize anyone who has lost a loved one to it. Rather, it is meant to serve as a scalpel—cutting through the layers of societal judgment, exposing our failure to see the humanity in others, whether in life or in death. Who can judge? None of us. If you or someone you know is struggling: In the U.S., you can call or text 988 to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline—available 24/7. International readers can find support through https://findahelpline.com, a global resource connecting individuals to mental health services in over 100 countries. You are not alone. Help is available.
- Category: Sociopolitical
- Views: 42
- Users favorite of this poem: Cheeky Missy, Bella Shepard, Poetic Licence, Friendship, Damaso, Teddy.15, ElizabethMoroz
Offline)
Comments15
(Aside: One day it would be awesome to discover the back story and origins of Tittu.)
Now look at that juxtaposition of everyday vices—coffee, wine, speed—with the raw judgment aimed at suicide cuts straight to the heart of how we normalise some escapes but ostracise the most desperate one. As a fellow writer who’s lived through caffeine-fuelled all-nighters and the creeping pressure to “keep it together,” your lines resonated on so many levels.
(Aside: I hope you noticed I honored that very thing in my "author's comment" today. 😀 I meant to reply sooner but I've had, shall we say, a rather harrowing week or so (work related)...but you know how those can be...refining like God's fire). On this end, everything is swell and now I am just catching up. Thanks for your time and your support! Truly and always appreciated! 🖤🙏🕯️🐦⬛
Excellent write Tristan
Thank you so much Tony! 🖤🙏🕯️🐦⬛
A dear cousin of mine, who was suffering with Parkinson's disease, took his life two years ago, he had a very methodical plan. We can't possibly imagine the pain of living that drives someone to leave it. I applaud your treatment of this sad circumstance, and the need for understanding of the human condition.
Thank you Bella. First, let me say this, I am deeply sorry to hear that. My father has Parkinson's Disease and other service (Vietnam) related illnesses. That is a tough disease of which I am personally facing with my father. So your words hit home. Thank you so much for your compassion/empathy and presence here on this poem and site. You are much appreciated! 🖤🙏🕯️🐦⬛
I commiserate with all your dear father is going through. He served his country during a very difficult time, and I thank him for his service. My husband was drafted during Vietnam, fortunately he was sent to Germany, but he has several friends who served there, and one who didn't come home. Wishing the very best to you and your family, and I know that your father has the love and support of a wonderful son.
You, you, oh YOU!!!! You men, particularly, know how to drive me insane in a heartbeat. Case in point, this pretty number! Argh! I want to scream in frustration! And yet likewise, I dearly love, love, LOVE this particular piece. Ugh! Unintentional suicide. We love to live dangerously. On the reverse side, our frenemies like to kill us slowly. Did I not fear the Scriptures, I might indulge when sorely tempted since sometimes lately the entire world is pointedly antagonistic and I'm not interested in being tortured. Besides, those who do take their own lives deliberately have their Creator to answer, and He's already answered. Enough of this can of worms. Gorgeously rendered with excellent imagery, clichés, poignancy and humor. Thank you so very much for sharing.
Missy, I appreciate you diving into this piece and feeling it so strongly…it means a lot when you engage like this. I’ll just note gently, for clarity’s sake, I’m not a man—I’m Queer, Transgender, and Non-binary—so when you read me, you’re hearing that voice for the most part, except when it's explicitly otherwise. Of course I do write my stuff to be open to interpretation and I can certainly appreciate your experience. I’m thankful for your words and the passion you always bring to my work, my friend. 🕯️🌈🙏 I truly hope all has been well since you left his comment...and it is great to be back and engaging again.
Thank you, Sir. Frankly, having thus clarified the issue, I know not whether to "... rage or laugh--" since by my instinctive response I've undone the assertion in a trice. Thank you again.
Creatively written this poem is a dark subject often avoided and when addressed often too late. Loved your formate again drawing attention to the downs and WIDE The subject is contentious and has many points of view. The taking of a life even your own has repercussions on others but then is it right to force someone with no hope of reprieve from chronic pain and suffering soon doomed to die anyway to live further just for others pleasure? Well done Tristan
Soren, you’ve engaged this exactly as I hoped...naming the weight of the subject while not shying from its complexity. That last question cuts to the heart of why I wrote this…there aren’t easy answers, and maybe there shouldn’t be. Always grateful for your thoughtful presence here, my friend. 🕯️⛓️💀🙏 I trust all has been well!
Most welcome my friend. Thank you for asking yes all is normal if there is such a thing and hope you are doing well aslso.
Hello, Tristan,
A very interesting poem. I know of six people who committed suicide either out of depression or a broken heart, two of which, I have no idea. They were all very determined and meticulous even. The pangs of living must have been unbearable and constantly unbearable bearing down on heart, soul and mind. As for the other 'acceptable' ways to go, I'm guilty of alcohol nicotine and caffeine especially so in my youth. This is an excellent poem, a valiant publication. Well done indeed. After reading this, I could not help myself from remembering those poor souls who lept to their deaths from The Twin Towers.
Fond regards,
Tony.
Tony, I appreciate you sharing such personal reflections here. Those losses you’ve known, and the memories they stir, speak to the very heart of why I wrote this piece. I too have lost too many friends and some family to suicide. At different times in my own life I have seriously contemplated it. The “acceptable” ways we leave are rarely judged as harshly…and yet the hurt/harm they leave behind is the same. Always grateful for your thoughtful engagement, my friend. 🕯️⛓️💀🙏
No one has any right to pass judgement on anyone who has tried or succeded in committing suicide. Even if you have had bad times yourself, you are not inside that's persons head, we all cope and deal differently with issues , it is a terrifying, lonely desperate position to be in, and I would not wish it on anyone, valid, poignant and honest write
Tobani you’ve captured exactly the heart of this...none of us can truly know what it’s like inside another’s head. It is lonely, desperate, and terrifying, and judgment only deepens the wound. I’m always grateful for your understanding and for the honesty you bring, my dear friend. 🕯️⛓️💀🙏
You are very welcome
A very dark and sad subject to discuss, but you wrote about it nicely, my friend.
Your poem addresses themes of mental health, addiction, societal judgment, and the struggle for dignity amidst grief. It emphasizes that while suicide is condemned, self-destructive behaviors like substance abuse are often normalized or overlooked. The poet appears to serve as a challenge to societal norms, provoke thought, and foster empathy for those struggling with these issues, highlighting the need for understanding rather than condemnation.
My friend, I appreciate how you’ve distilled the layers here so clearly. This was exactly the conversation I hoped the piece would spark...challenging those norms and calling for empathy over condemnation. Always grateful for the care and insight you bring to my work. 🕯️⛓️💀🙏 Hope all has been well.
Powerful and poignant. Strong writing.
Thank you, Thomas! Much appreciated. My friend, I appreciate how you’ve distilled the layers here so clearly. 🕯️⛓️💀🙏
A serious theme.
An aside from me too - Ohh, Popeye's too busy living, and........ don't answer how's he's busy! lol.
LOL! 🤐 I won't divulge secrets...but we have to admit the onset of lethargic arms became a life saver! 🛟🤣
Swoon! lol.
Wow, raw and real. A text that dares to rip the mask off this world in one fell swoop. Everyone is distracted from their own executioner by the speck in someone else's eye. A spectacle of writing. I thoroughly enjoyed it. Thanks for sharing. Best regards.
Damaso, I appreciate that you felt the rawness here. That image of everyone distracted from their own executioner while judging another...that’s exactly the hypocrisy I wanted to expose. Grateful you connected with it so strongly, my friend. 🕯️⛓️💀🙏
An important subject in my humble opinion, my brother committed suicide he was 25 and for the last 26 years of reflection, have come to the conclusion that some souls are just not meant for earth, they are more sensitive more restless, and no matter how much we try to help them in the end they leave, because that's what gives them peace. because that's just how it was supposed to be. This is only my thoughts in any case, my mother died of a broken heart in the end, so I know what suicide can do to us, the ones left behind. Kudos my dear Tristan. A subject even though devastating can also bring a great debate. 🤗
Teddy, your words about some souls not being meant for earth resonate deeply. It's so hard to understand or wrap one's head and heart around the pain others feel, let alone be in a place to understand their exit from this world; and yet, you are right...there are no easy answers. All we can do is process and try to arrive at peace and acceptance. I’ve lost friends and family to suicide as well, and in different seasons of my own life, I’ve stood too close to that edge. The hurt/harm for those left behind never fully fades, but the conversation matters…and I’m grateful you continue to be part of it, my dear friend. 🕯️⛓️💀🙏 I trust all has been well in your part of the world in my absence. It is good to be back and catch up!
Pertinent subject matter that is addressed sensitively in the notes and promotes discussion on how others perceive suicide and defines opens the door for a more considered sensitive and non judgmental approach to a very tragic and real element of life that is too often swept under the carpet. Well done for discussing such a sensitive topic with both the scalpel and thee sensitivity in the nites to balance. Brilliant and socially very responsible to include a helpline at the bottom. Well done Tristan, I’m passionate about mental health and this is a delicate subject that you have dealt with with skill. Elizabeth
Elizabeth, I truly appreciate your words here. This subject needs careful handling, and I’m glad the balance came through for you. I’m with you...mental health deserves open, unflinching conversation, and I’m grateful you see the value in pairing the scalpel with sensitivity. Always thankful for your thoughtful engagement, my friend. 🕯️⛓️💀🙏
My pleasure Tristan, there is much to be said about this delicate subject and I am always an advocate for both scalpel like precision and sensitivity. You handled this well. I look forward to more of your compositions my friend: Sincerely, Elizabeth
💜💜💜
One could argue that murder is more socially accepted than suicide
One certainly could! But one could not argue HOW HAPPY I AM TO SEE YOU! YAY Missed you tons my friend! 🕯️⛓️💀🙏
Thank you..I didn't know how much I was missed! This made me laugh, thank you!!
You were missed much! I always enjoy engaging with you, my friend!
sad but true - too many cases these days - and it's time they realized ,reached out, repented - turned over a new leaf and got on with their life
I appreciate your read, my dear friend. Indeed, suicide is terribly sad, and you’re right—too many people fall through the cracks into it, tragically. An awful reality. My intent here was less about telling people to turn over a leaf (which is often impossible with mental illness) and more about naming how cruelly we can respond when they can’t. Judgment compounds grief. Compassion could ease it. Thank you, again, for engaging and sharing your thoughts on this extremely important topic. 🕯️⛓️💀🙏
agree with you totally. compassion is needed when facing a person with mental health issues because it can save a person's life - and we should also be less judgmental about people and problems we know nothing about. this is a very sensitive and delicate topic.. a friend's husband had committed suicide due to financial problems much before i met and knew her, and she still has sleepless nights though she has raised bote her children well, and they are well settled. So i hope that grief finds other outlets than suicide
Thank you, Nafisa. I’m so sorry to hear about your friend’s husband...that’s a heartbreaking loss, and the fact she’s carried that weight while raising her children speaks volumes of her strength and resilience. Grief, as you said, never truly leaves, but compassion can make its path lighter to carry. If only we could all respond with that gentleness instead of judgment. 🖤🙏 Much love to you and your friend and all who are struggling in these ways. My hope is right with yours.
Amen to your thoughts, and may the world be a better place to live in - a bit of a challenge these days, but one can hope
take care, stay happy
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