At end of day

sorenbarrett

I've owned this world of dirt and it has owned me
Broken bottles, a torn shirt, fading foam on the sea 
I've had a wife of flesh and she owned me
At the end of a days thresh all I had was borrowed felicity 
Interest paid on mediocrity, a sharecropper of death
We own nothing but hypocrisy, not even our own breath 

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Comments +

Comments14

  • evenwheniLie

    ..Excellent word play, on the gives and takes of life that’s often spiritually consuming

    • sorenbarrett

      Thank you so much for the read and comment. As always they are deeply appreciated.

    • orchidee

      Good write SB. Sounds like KP and my marriage. heehee.

      • sorenbarrett

        Thanks Orchi that sounds rather grim hope things improve on the Homefront

      • Friendship

        The imagery of broken bottles and a torn shirt suggests a life marked by struggle and loss, while references to a "wife of flesh" and "borrowed felicity" indicate a complex relationship with love and happiness.

        • sorenbarrett

          A keen eye on the wording my friend. Thanks so much for the read and interpretation it is most appreciated

        • nephilim56 ( Norman Dickson)

          A message well said and so true

          • sorenbarrett

            Thank you so much for the read and kind words they are most appreciated

          • arqios

            This is so true of all of us whether we recognise it or not. A Fave πŸ•ŠοΈπŸ™

            • sorenbarrett

              Thank you so much Cryptic your words mean a lot

              • arqios

                Most welcome dear friend πŸ™πŸ»πŸ•ŠοΈ

              • Tristan Robert Lange

                My friend, that line about being a sharecropper of death… that one shakes loose the whole poem. It names the cost without flinching. Love it, Soren! Well done!πŸŒΉπŸ–€πŸ™πŸ•―οΈπŸ¦β€β¬›

                • sorenbarrett

                  Thanks my friend I appreciate your read and comment. It means a lot

                  • Tristan Robert Lange

                    You are most welcome!

                  • Carlos Alberto BUSTILLOS

                    In the end, nothing turns out the way we imagined. Life runs over us with the good and the bad. An interesting piece of work.

                    • sorenbarrett

                      Thank you Carlos for the review it is most appreciated

                    • 2781

                      Then shall the dust return to the earth as it was: and the spirit shall return to God who gave it.

                      • sorenbarrett

                        Indeed a powerful saying and so shall it be.

                      • Lorenz

                        Let's wait serenely the last crop...

                        • sorenbarrett

                          Wait we must serene or not and that last crop comes sooner than most plan. Thanks for the read it is appreciated Lorenz

                        • Kevin Hulme

                          The Ledger of life. Nice one.

                          • sorenbarrett

                            Thank you so much for the read and understanding comment.

                          • Aman 12

                            what a layered poem o existential disenchantment.

                            • sorenbarrett

                              Thank you so much Aman for this condensed interpretation of this piece. Yes indeed in the brightness of the sun one will see their shadow.

                            • Goldfinch60

                              To my mind this is so sad as my life is the reverse of this soren, I have been so lucky to live a fine life.

                              Andy

                              • sorenbarrett

                                Thank you so much Andy for the read. To appreciate the sweet one must taste the bitter. It is by differences that joy is measured.

                              • Jaryyn

                                Powerful text. Nice writing

                                • sorenbarrett

                                  Thank you for your review and words of support they are most appreciated

                                • jorge serra

                                  Is a good poem, it was White very well at the end of day, with a truth messsage.

                                  • sorenbarrett

                                    Thank you very much Jorge I appreciate your read and kind words. They are most appreciated



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