In the dead of night,
only the moon sees
my unwanted side,
the lonely in me.
She stays tucked deep
so no one knows
my feelings I hide
as a sacrifice.
Repercussions,
not reciprocation,
I'll never understand
emotional violation.
Stuck in my head
with so many thoughts,
like an indentured servant,
my happiness never bought.
Cinderella the maid,
my fairytale winced,
never showing grace,
been frigid ever since.
I want real love,
but I'm always cursed,
flowing these words,
shit aint rehearsed.
Visions in a dark room,
tears writing this verse,
they'll still be spinning
while I'm in that hearse.
Chains cover my lace,
I hide my tear-stained face,
I'm on the leeward side
of receiving grace.
Moonlight highlights
my unwilled tears
seeping in satin
on this rotating sphere.
Round and round
my head spins,
orbiting this body
with no amends.
Cries rain cacti,
my deserted heart,
keeping it alive
while I'm falling apart.
Peace, my war zone,
facing the front line.
Fireworks in my head
while spilling rhymes.
I watch their calm
while I shed tears,
silence speaks loudest
like fighting and fears.
I don't ask for much,
no diamonds or gold,
but to be wanted,
to have and to hold.
The fault in my stars,
is it only mine to bare?
I'll fade into blank space
where my seams tear.
Let laughter endure
love I wish I had
as I fade from knowing
my only better half.
-
Author:
xTattooing Paperx (Pseudonym) (
Offline) - Published: January 17th, 2026 22:09
- Comment from author about the poem: Losing myself means losing everyone around me. I built myself back up mentally, but I'm different now. The people closest to me don't understand. Image source: Google with edited graphics
- Category: Reflection
- Views: 11
- Users favorite of this poem: Efrain Cajar
Offline)
Comments5
Good write TP. I didn't recognise you in that skeleton. Which one's you?! lol.
I love skeletons. They show a shell with a hollow soul. Sort of how I feel now since I don't really know myself anymore
Always feel they're two people in everybody.
The person that's holding you back, and the person you want to be.
Overcoming the first can be a lifetime journey, but a journey we must take to survive.
That's why we leave people behind when we grow, and maybe they resent it, but it has to be done.
It's too much of an internal war for me. It hurts the most not knowing me anymore, let alone if anyone else does. Thanx for the read.
You do have it bad. This calls for boxing gloves and a punch bag to knock the crap out of, though naturally just the punch bag, don't be randomly punching people in the street. Mind you, some of the ferals on the streets now.
Hey but I am tempted lol. I know a few who need it, but yes, totally inhumane of me. So true. Even so many raising kids around this area are in those streets.
Self change often mean relationships change as well. I love the bit of humor with cacti and deserted self. A poem or an existential nature. It has good flow and rhyme. Well done
Even my depression comes with a bit of humor lol.
All the better it sweetens the aftertaste.
Only way I can keep swallowing it
Your words carry a raw, unflinching honesty—each line trembles with emotion that’s impossible to ignore. Truly felt, deeply lived.
Thanks for noticing that, Thomas.
I remember feeling very alone at night without love, such a beautiful poem. 🌹
It makes us contemplate our own existence at times. Thanks, Teddy.
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