Pretty Isn't Pretty Enough

I try everything I can,

I change my hair,

And I go through outfits yet I fall into despair,

I look in the mirror and realise the truth ---  I hate how I look .

I don't like how my hair frames my face,

I look in the mirror and feel pure disgust,

I was fine before, then I fell from grace,

I've started struggling again; another one bites the dust.

I don't like how my body looks, I think I look too thin,

But at the same time, I possess a violent fear of gaining weight,

The scale has become my enemy,

Before eating I've started to hesitate.

No matter what I do , there's always something in the mirror that I think looks wrong,

Compliment are starting to feel like twisted lies,

I can't get myself to believe them,

Now looking too long in the mirror feels like torture and I fall into demise.

I look in the mirror picking at every flaw I find,

And I can't get myself to stop even though I want to,

It's like I'm not even looking at myself anymore in the mirror,

It's someone else entirely and I hate how she looks.

I think to myself, "maybe it's not that bad",

But I don't believe that,

And even if I do , there's always a mirror,  always a reflection, lurking, waiting to prove me wrong,

And all of a sudden I'm back where I started.

I spend hours looking in the mirror,

Trying to fix whatever is wrong,

I feel sick to my stomach looking at my picture,

Because after all, pretty Isn't Pretty Enough.