I know. I’ve always known. Children are innocently blunt. Adults are ignorant at best, and malicious at worst. I think our family tried. But the moments of awkward silence. The not so quiet snide comments. The looks of judgement.
I knew what I looked like and why it was bad before I ever had a chance at beating you at Mario kart. Before my baby dolls felt noticeably hollow. Before we stopped playing Pokémon. I knew for sure I was fat by kindergarten. I let it sink in that my nose was too big in 7th grade. I knew my shoulders were too broad in 5th. I knew my hair was too curly and frizzy in preschool. We both know there’s more, but why get into all of it really.
I was always envious of you. I always will be. It’s not fair to you, because it’s not your fault. My beautiful sister. You’ve faced things I wouldn’t understand. And I’ll never tell you what our family used to say about me when you weren’t around. I’m so sorry something innocent and inherent about you makes me feel so insecure. I promise I’m trying. I know. I’ve always known.
Love,
The ugly sister
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Comments3
Oh this is so painful to read. I know you may not believe a stranger on the internet, but I believe everyone is beautiful no matter their race, shape, or size. This is such a bittersweet poem, but please don’t consider yourself the ugly sister. Comparison will take your joy, and your features are what make you, you. I understand that feeling, especially from family where they’re meant to be supportive but instead surround us with judgement. I wish you the very best and I hope you realize how beautiful you are.
This letter to a sibling perceived as innocent is self demeaning and deprecatory. It is sad and I can feel the pain of poor self esteem. Well written
Funnily enough, there's more insecurity in beautiful people than others it seems.
Now, confident people don't care how they look, they're to busy radiating to be bothered.
You've highlighted your negative,s dump them, concentrate on the positives, like writing, which you do well.
Get out running, walking, something that makes you uncomfortable, but makes you laugh too.
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