war

it went too far
decades ago

we should have known, then
when shell-shocked soldiers 
could not find rest
innocent men
trying their best
the essence of humanity
put to the test
i must confess
i underestimated their ability
to stare death in the face
and choose to be brave

my friend, countries away
sends a message each day
to reassure that he is okay
"the bombs are so loud,
i hear them from home
i have been safe
but for my friends, it's been close"
and i want to rage
i want to scream
i want to spit in the face
of these evil men's dreams

when i cower beneath sheets
bracing for more headlines
deadlines
men dead, frontlines 
overused punchlines
to make us feel better
i am bitter
i pray, on my knees
that the hatred will not
find it's way to me
but it feels like a matter of time

every good thing
every good moment
i find fear in the corner
waiting for his moment to shine
spread misery in happy lives
take away the simple right
to be fine 

i hold the hands
of everyone i love
and hope that they do not 
leave me

i hope that this world
frees me
but hope
is fleeting
and the fear
is feasting

as bombs explode
and shatter cities
into bodies of smoke
i cough on the taste
of rage

for years 
it has been the same
i will not allow it
i will not stand for it
if the world is corrupt
then let it burn, damn it
if one day, this page
is charred and half-formed
trampled beneath feet
of a soldier storm

i was here, really
existing, completely
we are more than just numbers
we are beating hearts

i want it to end
but i fear
this is the start

it went too far
decades ago
we should have known.

12:58pm - 07/03/26.