She was naked except for a frown
I knew that face
I sat her down
Tell me honey, what’s on your mind
Are you making a statement
Am I a clown
Was it something I said
Maybe didn’t do
Give me a clue
Is it your birthday
No, anniversary, did your mum die
Let me down gently, don’t lie
Well I must admit
You’ve really stumped me now
Speak up woman
Get it out
I’m not a bloody psychic
You’re driving me nuts
No more buts
Spit it out woman
I’m not your wife
Your trouble and strife
This is not your house
You idiotic louse
Now get to hell out
And let me leave you in no doubt
If I was your wife
I would shoot you dead
Cut off your head
Dance around your grave
Shoot you again
Just so I could save
The very best for last
The final blast
Now do one.
Well, glad you set me straight
Bit melodramatic
Couldn’t you just scream
Wake me from my dream
When I said spit it out
Didn’t expect a bloody rout
A hissy fit
Raving woman, foaming from the mouth
Words heading south
Anyway, whilst I’m here
Seems a shame
Don’t suppose you fancy
That’ll be a no
Okay, suppose I better go
Although I do think you’re a real hit
Oh, and great 'personality..'
-
Author:
Paul Bell (Pseudonym) (
Offline) - Published: August 7th, 2026 05:16
- Category: Humor
- Views: 10
- Users favorite of this poem: Tristan Robert Lange, Cheeky Missy
Offline)
Comments4
This one made me smile with the twists in plot and the fun about feigned or real recognition problems and memory. I guess it never hurts to try. Fine write Paul
Oh Paul...😂 This guy doesn’t merely put his foot in his mouth, he climbs in after it and starts redecorating. By the end I’m amazed she hasn’t made good on at least one of those threats. Hilarious stuff, my friend! 🌹🖤🙏🕯️🐦⬛
The guy's a tryer, I'll give him that.
You certainly enjoy tickling the boundaries of good taste, which serves both for a good laugh and a challenge to the stiff upper lip syndrome which I understand to be an affliction possessed of Englishmen…..
You need a laugh out there.
When are you getting a poem out.
You guys. I give up. Beautifully rendered with excellent imagery and a damning poignancy. Thank you for sharing.
She was a lovely girl the police told me. lol
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