BLACK HAWAII
Mozzarella is the best Cheese yet,
Add Pineapple Chunks for a surefire bet.
But my Hawaiian Pizza was completely burnt,
So it's times like this a lesson learned:
Aloha Temperature should've been set.
NONE DIRECTION
I had a huge fight the other night,
With my Girlfriend Virginia, the love of my life.
She pointed out on close Inspection,
That I appeared to have no sense of direction-
Well I just had enough and got up and Right.
-
Author:
Kevin Hulme (Pseudonym) (
Offline) - Published: September 5th, 2026 16:07
- Category: Humor
- Views: 15
- Users favorite of this poem: Tristan Robert Lange
Offline)
Comments5
Adjustments made for circumstances. A fun read, well done.
Thank you . 🍕👍
You are most welcome
Kevin, these had me laughing. Two quick shots, two gloriously bad decisions, and both land exactly where they should. Fun stuff, my friend. 😂🌹🙏🐦⬛
Thanking you. 🍕👍
Also appreciate the fave. 👍
Ah. the small disasters in life! Burnt food and friction in relationships! Later on they become stuff for a bit of a larf 👍🏻🕊️
Yes. Thank you for Reading and sending a Comment.
No experience of a Hawaiian Pizza, thankfully, but some with a burnt pizza and a blunt knife in particular the one where half shot the beer off the table and the other landed in my lap - one redeeming element: the pizza was so dry it did not threaten my sartorial elegance one whit.
I decline to involve myself in marital disputes of any kind.
Must admit: I've never had a Pizza. Not keen on Cheese . Just Cheesy Limericks . Thank you for Reading.
Please try to confine yourself to issues you feel deeply about such as the weather... popular topic
which Pommys find fascinating...
And Winning the Ashes 🏏🏏
There’s a damn delightful dad-joke precision to both of these, with the setups sounding almost respectable before the final words yank the rug out—“Aloha Temperature” is gloriously terrible in exactly the right way. “None Direction” is even cleaner, though: the girlfriend says he has no sense of direction, so he gets up and goes “Right”—a wonderfully stupid little punchline that lands because it’s so perfectly literal.
As always: I appreciate your Comments. Thank you.
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