First day of my life, you came with a life
Only you were with me all the time, and made my day
Never thought for a friend, but you were given by life
My life went on rejoice, it had never seen such a joy
My thoughts were like tides of a bay
You came in the way like a lie
Your glorious name took me away, from my way
I totally trusted all that lie, and made me in that lie
If “truth will come out one day”
And if this statement is true
Then it came out in its way
And the entire true became untrue and you became true
An apology can’t dehydrate your wounds
But an apology may drain my mistake
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Author:
nikhil PS (Pseudonym) (
Offline) - Published: January 21st, 2011 15:01
- Comment from author about the poem: I TRIED TO WRITE A SONNET... I DON'T KNW WAT I HAD WRITTEN... BY I TRIED TO COMPOSE ALL THESE WORDS LIKE A SONNET... WITH All the knwledge that i have abt the sonnet....
- Category: Friendship
- Views: 70
- Users favorite of this poem: nikhilps, Cheeky Missy, Lifewellspoken.
Offline)
Comments2
Hey! 14 lines....great! Now you need to make it iambic pentametre...adding the end-rhyming in the Shakespearian or Petrarchan/Italian pattern. Wow. Where did you get the idea to try? This is too cool that you tried! I wish you all success. But to my limited knowledge, this is not a sonnet. It is a sad poem for the initial rejoicing and joyful life that the false friend gave and then the horrible truth that it was only a lie. Your last two lines are fascinating, in their poetic assessment of the usefulness of the apology. I am so very glad you are trying to write sonnets.....again, I wish you all success in this endeavor....la, you'll doubtless do so much better than me...oooh, your poor Chechi! This was a nice attempt. Love, your Chechi
nope chechi!! u r a g8 poet... and ur judgments made me to improve more...and it was my mistake that i bunked the 10mints frm the class... and the class which was dealing with sonnets... so i missed the most important rule of rhyme... i'll make this poem into a sonnet and send u.... ok???
Sweet....little brother! I am looking forward to it! Thanks! Love, your Chechi
really very nice...a same incident happened with me too!i can empathize it!...the last 2 lines seems to be coated with pain!
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