I Can See

Lonelykaren

i can see
darkness all around
consuming me
taking me
loving me
embracing me
talking to me

i can see
hate all around
calling me
telling me
fooling me
making me
killing me

i can see
anger all around
burning me
touching me
feeling me
hating me
desolving me

i can see
grief all around
hiding me
sheltering me
carrying me
folding me
answering me

i can see
death all around
showing me
finding me
laughing at me
looking at me
taking me

i can see
all of that
i cant see
the rest of anything
just death, grief, anger, hate and darkness
it all beckons to meeee!!!!!

 

  • Author: Lonelykaren (Pseudonym) (Offline Offline)
  • Published: February 11th, 2011 14:01
  • Comment from author about the poem: well i wrote this adn just to be clear i know thsoe things dont show anything but its just a figure of speech. In a way i guess it sucks. my teacher said your not a poet so STOP ha ha he wishes i did.
  • Category: Reflection
  • Views: 27
  • User favorite of this poem: Cheeky Missy.
Get a free collection of Classic Poetry ↓

Receive the ebook in seconds 50 poems from 50 different authors


Comments1

  • Cheeky Missy

    Didn't your teacher tell you what you were doing wrong and what you needed to change to become the poet you aspired to be? That would be instructive and rather useful, to say the least. He didn't like the thoughts you presented in this?....I guess the problem is that once folk embrace free verse, there seems such a wide field that anyone can claim success in poetry, seems to me; and then again rhyme and rythm seem insufficient by themselves as well. Well of course I am nobody, but the images you presented in each stanza seemed good.

    • Lonelykaren

      Thanks for your response. By the way you are someone in a way and my teacher said im not a poet cuz im too young and that in many ways deserve what is happening.. i dont know why he is mean to me but yeah



    To be able to comment and rate this poem, you must be registered. Register here or if you are already registered, login here.