This Feeling

What is this feeling, that is so unclear?
It's hard to describe, I can't tell of it's real.
Mixed of emotions that goes through my head,
I keep them to myself and leave them unsaid.

The way you look and smile at him,
I sit and watch as the lights dim.
Somehow, to you, he seems so special,
And I don't even deserve to be his rival.

I'm stuck inside my mind,
Just waiting for someone to come help me find,
The life I led that has been lost,
I need to find it no matter what's the cost.

I must be lying to myself about what I feel,
My emotions seem to disobey my will.
No matter how I try, I just can't hate you.
And yet what I feel, you have no clue.

The way your hair flows,
The way your face glows,
You're like a shining star,
And I'm only allowed to watch from afar.

Why do I kept thinking I might have a chance?
Maybe it's true, not everyone can achieve romance.
I tried my best to live by my own rules,
Despite the fact that I'm such a fool.

I questioned myself, "Am I welcome here?"
I kept asking, "Should I disappear?"
I hope someday I'll find the answer,
Perhaps patience is all that matter.