Ode To Parker

Parker, beanie as purple as my wife's face

Purple it turned when I sprayed her with mace.

Parker, well versed in life

Parker, never had a wife

Parker, so very fat

Parker, stupid as a cat

Cats, stupid as a Parker

 

Meow

 

Parker, his beard reaching his neck, a razor never touched

Parker, the only thing a razor touched was his wrists

Parker, punching babies with his fists

Parker, stupid as a cat.

 

Parker, my best friend

Parker, a man I will always defend

Parker, for my life I would end

Parker, devoted I am.

Parker, stupid as a FUCKING cat.

 

Parker, his belly button deep as my soul

Parker, everyone notices his mole

 

Everyone.

 

Parker, stupid as a cat.

Parker, useless as a mat

Parker, on his ass he always sat

Parker, sitting with his cat

Parker, his cat was smarter than him

Parker, stupid as a FUCKING CAT.

 

PARKER YOU ARE RETARDED.