Kate

Eyelashes flutter, I turn to butter under the gaze of this frivolous flirt

Our eyes meet, my heart skips a beat and blood rushes out to my cheeks

Away she dances and I take my chances though I know this could all end in hurt

After her I soar, straight across the floor, through the crowd I get a quick peek

Balls to the wall, come one come all, heart sewn to the sleeve of my shirt

Confidence fails me, my words they betray me as I struggle in vain to speak

Cards on the table, not willing or able to salvage my soul from the dirt

Today becomes tomorrow, 3am sorrow, all over for yet another week

Alone in bed, a war in my head, the sides rabid and unevenly matched

On one side the light, lacking in might, outmanned by dominant dark

No will to dream, no self esteem, a psyche haphazardly patched

Through memories, shading under trees, names scratched crudely into the bark

As my eyes close, my subconscious goes back to where those memories are stashed

I squeeze them shut and pray I can put myself into a dream where I hark

Back to a time, before all that wine when I left your faith broken and trashed

Love disavowed, from then to now, the contrast is painfully stark

Alone in a bar to the sound of guitars being played with moderate skill

Pint in hand, I listen to a band giving their all but still coming up short

Two quid on the door, a crowded dance floor, yet another Friday night thrill

Not much of a show, played a couple I know, but beyond that not much to report

Quarter to one, not having much fun, was considering leaving until

A man storms in, screaming into the din, wielding a rifle of some sort

He jumps up on stage, and spews his rage to a room now eerily still

Screams muffled, feet shuffle, the only exit covered, no hope of support

Barrel overhead, threatening lead to anyone who dare make a sound

The gunman stares, lingering on pairs and yells with all his might: “Kate!”

His eyes are set and his voice is met by whimpers from the assembled crowd

His eyes meet mine and tingle my spine as I don’t see the anticipated hate

“I know you’re in here!” Is that a tear? “I know you and him are around!”

In a moment I know where this all will go, and it may be already too late

“My friend,” I pretend that I’m a brave man and slowly start to make ground

The barrel points at me, all around flee as the gunman says “I’m not your mate.”

“Fair enough.” My hands up, I take one last step, then stand facing this man

“Why are you here?” I speak nice and clear “What, exactly is the plan?”

He scans the room, soon to be tomb, the gun drifts away from my chest

“Keep that pointed at me.” He turns to agree and says “Maybe that is for the best.”

His story unfurls, it’s all for a girl, who left him with bloodied, trampled heart

He addresses us all, his words they enthrall, a tale worthy of this macabre art

Almost an hour, the crowd still cower, unable to grasp his true meaning

The barrel drifts up, I tell him to stop but he splatters his brains on the ceiling

Police ask questions but learn no lessons from my answers monosyllabic

They ask how I knew what he would do, “I know a suicidal man when I see one”

They give me my leave and I begin to weave through blatant stares and slow traffic

Voices call but I ignore them all, down the street, round the corner and gone

A world rocked, a state of shock, I fumble in my brain to make sense of what happened

Out of the night comes a voice, soft and light, demanding that I should wait

A girl runs over, I feel like I know her, from where and when and why and

She comes at me bold, hair of dark gold, she says “Hi there, my name is Kate.”

“That Kate?” I ask, without semblance of tact as she awkwardly stares at her feet

“Yes,” she replies with a mist to her eyes, “That man was my ex-boyfriend, Sean.”

“Sorry.” I mutter and glance at the gutter, before beginning to turn back down the street.

“It’s alright,” she soothes, “I’m not here to fight, there’s no need to look so forlorn.”

“I don’t want to go home,” at least not alone, I didn’t dare say that second bit

“Neither do I” and she catches my eye with the glint of a old sun reborn

I catch myself. What the hell? Is my journey to the dark side complete

An immediate crush, Sean’s brain still mush, has my conscience completely been worn?

She takes me by hand, leads me away and asks me “So, what is your name?”

We meander and wander and all the while I ponder just what am I doing with this girl

She’s asking me questions and has yet to mention that she’s leaving or that this is a game

I’m starting to like her but, thanks to my psyche, it’s unlikely I’d give it a whirl

By asking her to mine, or out another time, could the two be one and the same?

But what am I doing? This girl had been through so much just few hours earlier

On this same night! She must be frightened but she seems so composed and tame

Perhaps she is like me, damaged and empty, I should probably stay away from this girl

But I don’t want to, I can’t do, for we all know misery loves company

The sun begins to rise and there’s an ache in my thighs from walking for hours straight

I was just thinking that we’d need to head back when she said “Come home with me.”

It’d be just you and I,” said the spider to the fly, “My place is close by and it’s late

Or early, perhaps” and she forces a laugh and I smile despite wanting to scream

This is wrong, it’s gone on too long or maybe, just maybe, it’s fate

Can tragedy be the kindling of ecstasy? Can a nightmare give birth to a dream?

Evil or just bold, Sean’s body not cold, I walk into the sunrise with Kate