Sick To My Stomach

I'm sick to my stomach
It's aching and twisting
I'm sick to my stomach

I want to tell him but I can't
I start to write him a message then I delete each letter
One by one with a methodical click
And I can't seem to tell him what I want to

I'm sick to my stomach
It's churning and rolling
I'm sick to my stomach

I need to scream
So I smother my shriek into my pillow
I need to SCREAM

I'm sick to my stomach
It's burning and I'm cold
I'm sick to my stomach

I love him
I love him
I love him
As a friend or maybe more
And I might be leaving him behind

I'm sick of all this noise, these people clamoring
IT'S CROWDED AND I'M CLAUSTROPHOBIC
I'm sick of all this uncertainty, this tick tocking
It's loud and I'm sensitive to the noise

He's talking, I'm listening, wishing I could run
Run run run away even though I love him
I can't bear the thought of leaving him
And my tongue is twisted, my fingers are tied

I'm tired, tired, tired
And I'm sick to my stomach
Goodnight, sleep tight
Texting him and saying goodbye
Can't tell him, wondering why

He's my kryptonite
He's my nightlight
When I run, I run towards him
Not away
And now I'm crying I'm crying

Sick of all this breaking down, sick of all the barking noise
Sick of all the too loud sounds, sick of always being poised
I'm tired of my stomach aching
Tired of my red heart breaking

Cigarettes and burning liquor bottles
I'm falling down like the London Bridge
Can he hold me up any longer?
Can he keep on getting stronger?

When I get a scraped knee he's always there for me
Patching me up with a bandaid even though he's not paid

I'm falling down like the London Bridge
I love him but I can't tell him
I might be leaving him
My tongue is twisted, my hands are tied
My ankles are aching my head is pounding
I'm sick to my stomach