Figuring it all out

Life sucks & is never going to be great.
Its really hard to keep my head straight.

I am not sick, but I'm not well
Cant tell, if this is heaven or hell.

Think, I'm insane inside the membrane.
Think, I've hopped aboard the crazy train.

I have No desires society says are normal.
I have No desires to go to galas that are formal.

I do not want spend income being loyal to a brand name.
That just makes life into a shallow, material acquiring game.

With life, I'll pursue my own personal artistic passions.
I'll stay away from the latest shallow-herd-following trending fashion.

When life is always trying to give me the sack.
I will try not to let the anger monkeys jump on my back.

I know I have a brief amount of time under the sun.
Cause soon my short mortal lifespan here will be done.

Life always seems out of season.
There is never a rhyme or a reason.

I look for explanations where there are none.
I wish I could I have the answers & just be done.

I Wish the old dogma's where true. But science says otherwise,
And infallible knowledge from a human, is something I despise.

There are more stars on the galaxies waistband
Than earth’s beaches have tiny grains of sand.

This number my brain can not comprehend
It overloads, implodes, & needs time to mend.

I can only scream into the void, & shout.
I will never have it all figured OUT.

I will never have it all figured out.
...I will never have it all figured out.
Damnt!
...Fuck. Fuck it. Fuck it. Shit.
I don't know, shit!
Fuck it! FUCK IT!

These give me a headache, i not going to anymore.

I fucking quit!
Screw thinking.
Fuck this shit!

.... Smoke effect bong sound...

....(stoner voice/character) oh shit sorry there man. I was taking life seriously there for a second, hahaheheahaha. ;)