Turmoil Tears

So I’m not sleeping very well


Usually up until at least 3am every night


My mind won’t slow down


My legs don’t keep still

My body aches and yearns so much for my fantasies to become reality

 

My heart races 


Breathing goes heavier


Toes curl


Body quivers in the quilt

It’s getting Warmer

I literally am struggling to gulp and swallow


Mouth is drying up

I long to be kissed

Long to be touched


I still can’t keep still


Getting full body tingles

 

I lay here at night, just thinking about my new journey , researching into the BDSM world 


I’ve had submissive thoughts for years

I just didn’t know what they meant

 

I feel well and truly awakened


Like I’ve found myself

Found where I truly belong

 

I get huge waves of emotion just thinking about it , it consumes me

That massive wave crashes against my skin and I literally cry i want it so much

 

“Don’t rush dear child , you cannot rush to find your Dom , you have only just found yourself! Small steady steps" says the voice in my head

 

This is my new journey

Part of me feels free


But part of me is trapped

Longing to be found and owned

 

I need it so much

My body aches for it

It just can't keep still

I not only crave it physically, but emotionally too

I believe it will happen

Yet I still cry

I cry because I feel passionate that this is who I truly am

 

I’m a Submissive

I’m home

Yet I’m waiting to be found