The City Behind Me

The city I have forgotten

My "self" is leaving me again.
Maybe because it is in this forgotten city.
Maybe it is because we always
Loose a piece of ourselves when we loose someone we love.

I see her face and try to remember her eyes,
The way she moved her hands, her smile.
Over and over again .
Afraid that I will no longer be able to remember her.

Another line has been an crossed.
Another time when I can't go back.
Another place that will never be the same,
Just like the last time I lost someone

I realize that I am being forced to grow up again
To accept loosing what I want to hang on to
To grieve in an everlasting way.
I try hard to understand it but meanings are not defined.

My thoughts are echoing within me again,
Cracking the earth and sinking deep into
My childhood, my parents, my love,
my soul, my heart, my friends, my family.

So many loved ones have left me here,
I want to run and yet I can't escape.
The only thing I can do is cry.
Cry for me and everyone who loved them.

This forgotten city always haunts me
And freezes time, memories and thoughts.
I depart with muted feet and the silence follows me.
Only time and thoughts are left behind