Ruth Fadairo

a father's love.

I never understood pain. 

I never understood heartbreak.
Until the day you told me you were leaving
For a very long time.

 

You told me you had things to do,
Things to accomplish,
But without me.
Tell me this isn't true?

 

I didn't believe you,
I thought you were joking..
Or just exaggerating.
But you left, and my heart left with you.

 

But one fine day, joy touched my mouth as the sides of my cheeks began to crease
The 12 year old me,
Happy to see,
A text from her beloved father!

 

Oh the joy, my father!
I knew you could never disappoint me!
I had faith that you'd come back.
After all, our birthday is on the same day,
How amazing is that.

 

Yet, I thought it was too good to be true,
And yes, 12 year old me was right.
Because 6 months later, what happened?
You disappeared.
Vanished from the face of the earth.

 

But I forgive you,
I really do.
You're still my father,
You still made a contribution to my life thus far.

 

Although you failed me as my first love
I forgive you.
And although you are not here,
With me,
I still forgive you.

 

You've taught me some serious life lessons,
Valuable ones at that.

 

I've learned to be more forgiving,
More sympathetic,
More emphatic,
For I cannot let the damage you've caused,
Invade my entire life, you see.

 

Just because you're not around,
Does not me my life should be turned upside down,
Because of you.

 

I'll still believe in love,
in hope,
in faith.

 

I still believe in you,

 

Just get better, for my sake.

 

Please.

       

 

       - A father's love never does nor does mine for you. 

Comments6

  • onepauly

    I found one part of it shocking.
    can you tell me which part?

    • Ruth Fadairo

      haha no idea, which part?

      • onepauly

        the first line

      • Gary Edward Geraci

        Your poem encapsulates the maturity of a soul that sees another soul as God must see it. Your courage and resolve to continue on transcends the crushing disappointment and rejection that one feels when one learns the truth about a parent's shortcomings. Your forgiveness opens the doors for mercy and with our Lord's grace, the end of this poem is yet to be told.

        • Ruth Fadairo

          thank you so much! and AMEN!

        • FredPeyer

          Ruth you do have a gift for writing. With such a sad subject matter you are taking us on a roller-coaster ride of downs and ups and downs with an incredible ending of forgiveness.
          Mahalo for a great poem.

        • Seek

          Love's power set you free, Ruth. Where else could you summon the courage to forgive, where many would simply condemn?

        • burning-embers

          Really touched me with this Ruth. Love conquers all doesn't it.

          • Ruth Fadairo

            yes it does! thank you 🙂

          • onepauly

            the first line



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