Dear Depression,
Remember me?
your oldest friend
your bittersweet lover?
I fondly remember
meeting you for the first time
at age 12
when my father abandoned me
leaving me here alone in the dark
at age 13 you became my only
companion the only one I could call friend.
What I have learned of sadness
and despair in its purest form
was from you depression.
At 14 you showed me
only comfort comes
from slashing my wrists
shedding my blood
to bring serenity
to silence the voices
in my mind the voices
that won't go to sleep.
When everyone left me alone
your encouraging voice rang in my head
"Just end it" "You'll be pain free"
Because of you
everywhere I go
I'm see as a creature
an ugly creature.
At age 15 I sold my soul to you
I gave you my heart and mind
in exchange for my sanity.
in exchange for my mentality.
At age 16 I thought
you left me alone once again
I find myself in limbo
between hope and despair.
I thought I was alone again.
At 18 you came back in my life
only to taunt and torture me
like he did he told me loved me
he had a hell of a way to show it.
I was nothing to him but his puppet
and he was pulling my strings.
Because of you depression
I live each day with darkness in me
waiting to engulf me in it's embrace.
Depression, my depression feels
like a demon sucking every drop of life from me
leaving an empty shell in it's wake.
Depression makes you wonder
if your life has meaning
or is it nothing but an empty void
with no purpose
no meaning.
Now at age 20
I have let failure go
I have let despair go
I have let anger go
I have let sadness go
I have let you go depression.
Dear depression
Here I am at age 20
You don't own me anymore
I have embraced hope
and embraced new life
I am living life each day to the fullest.
My life now has meaning
my life now has purpose.
Dear depression
you are not welcome here anymore
Goodbye!
- Author: DarkAngelPoetry (Pseudonym) ( Offline)
- Published: August 14th, 2017 10:35
- Comment from author about the poem: I have been dealing with depression since I was 13 years old due to difficult things in my life that I have had to deal with growing up, My father leaving me and my family at the age of 12 left a mark on me that will always be there for the rest of my life yet I am still here. I wrote this as an open letter to my depression declaring that depression has no control over me and I am the bigger person. This piece contains triggering material (mentions of self harm and emotional abuse).
- Category: Letter
- Views: 37
Comments3
WOW, A life story and one full of tragic events. I am glad you have learned to let go and I trust writing about it helped with that endeavor.
Thank you, writing has always been my get away
I understand that completely.
I am living life each day to the fullest.
That is the spirit. The best way to celebrate the victory. Congratulations, You beat it.
Thank you
Wow! Felt your torture in so many lines - glad you have turned a corner.
Sue
Thank you
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