Losing Faith

lanaevans

I'm losing faith.

 

Nothing I can do with an ugly face and a rotten brain.

 

I reek of inadequacy.

 

I stink of wasted existence.

 

All the dreams I have will stay behind my eyelids.

 

I aspire to be a musician but I'm much too different than the average.

 

I live through visions that never happen.

 

I live in my head because reality seems to be against me.

 

What do I have to lose if I'm empty?

 

But what do I have to gain if I'm full of myself?

 

I'm losing faith.

 

A disgrace to the human race, I die in last place.

 

I'm hiding my face for your benefit.

 

And I contribute nothing to this world so what am I doing here?

 

Too scared to show who I am, afraid of judgement from peers.

 

They already don't like me so why do I even care.

 

I'm losing faith.

 

Don't know where to go from here.

 

Bullet to the brain always seemed like a good idea.

  • Author: lanaevans (Offline Offline)
  • Published: August 31st, 2017 19:50
  • Category: Unclassified
  • Views: 19
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Comments +

Comments2

  • NikitaPassmore

    I love this the ending is so relatable "bullet to the brain always seemed like a good idea."

    • lanaevans

      Thank you!

    • Gary Edward Geraci

      That bullet would be an affront to the Creator whom alone decides when our lives are done here. In His loving estimation of you - you are unique and unrepeatable - he gives you a wide space of freedom to figure this out. Suicide is never the answer my friend nor is there any beauty or art in it for that matter. If things get too heavy for you go to NAMI.



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