Hiding with a Prescription

I am witness to my own death

With my gravestone tattooed to my chest

I may look 

And feel alive

But there is no one home

I take pills to rise 

And pills to rest

Pills to fight nightmares 

And pills to no longer be afraid

I wash them down with courage

No longer able to feel the slightest

I rise to a fog

A cloud of grey

That hides my history

That hides my pain

I cannot remember happiness

But I also cannot remember the car wreck that brought me

to today

Which brings the question

Is the curtain worth forgetting the pain?

I look upon my families eyes

And ask what times have I forgot

Just numb the pain

My funeral has already came

And gone long ago

I do not have to be dead to have a funeral

just shade my brain in darkness

And forgot the path that brought me here

Now these medications 

Are a wall that keeps the flood away

For if they hit me now

I will surely be washed away

And there will be nothing to numb

And nothing to hide away

So kill me softly

And not with countless nerve endings, shooting with pain

Slowly may I go

But in my mind no one will remember this day

Nor remember my name