FredPeyer

Still House

Surrounded by the stillness of the house

With her presence still lingering languidly

He was sitting dejectedly at the kitchen table

Holding her perfumed stationery note

That simply said: ‘I’ve had enough’

Comments7

  • Goldfinch60

    I do hope this is not true, it is a very powerful write Fred.

    • FredPeyer

      Thank you so much for your concern, Goldfinch! Strictly imagination.

    • orchidee

      Good write Fred. I wish it was true of KP, that she's had enough of me. I've had enough of her since day one! doh! lol.

      • FredPeyer

        Thank you orchidee! It was KP, so you can relax now! :-)
        And better tell Santi, so she can stop teasing you!!!

        • orchidee

          Boohoo, it's enough to make me write dark poems every day. I've got a head start over some folk! lol. Halloween soon? For me, it'll be all year round (oh do stop moaning Orchi. lol)

        • 2 more comments

        • WL Schuett

          Good write I can feel his rejection being left with a note , very cold

          • FredPeyer

            Thanks WL, at least he had a note. Some are left with nothing. I just wanted to capture the mood immediately after a breakup.

          • malubotelho

            Very great write Fred. You’ve captured that moment so well. Very deep and sad. I could feel the emptiness of the house right on my heart.

            • FredPeyer

              Thanks Malu, the whole poem is really just about that initial moment of loneliness.

            • Louis Gibbs

              Ouch! That would cut deep. Glad it came from your fertile imagination. Well done, Fred!
              P.S. Welcome back, Kat!

              • FredPeyer

                Thanks Louis, I once, a long time ago, received a 'dear John' letter, but that worked out for the best.

              • Poetic Dan

                This was so powerful for me!
                To many words to put in any story of order, so I'll just give thanks for help you are giving me.

                • FredPeyer

                  Thank you PD for your kind comment, and you are welcome regarding the help, even though I don't know how I helped you. And hey, anytime you want to chat or get something off your jest, I do have a mailbox!

                • dusk arising

                  Superb opening line. At such times you can almost wear that silence like a cloak. Love this piece. into my fav's

                  • FredPeyer

                    Thanks so much da, your comment means a lot!



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