joyrides

i'm sick of screaming, 
i just wanna get along, 
can’t kill my head anymore 
can’t make Heaven last long 
i think i’m gonna be God’s whore 
i think i’m gonna drown down here 
my bones will disappear into the back 
of a classroom--the Midwest’s my puppeteer, my mind’s 
about to go boom 

i’m on the inside 
i’m the mouth that lied, hands that tried, brain that died 
i’m sitting within our late night joyrides forever 
forever the smoke lingers in backyard summers 
i’m at your funeral five years from now 
hit me like a bullet, drop a bomb by the grace of God somehow 
never knew, yell till i come to 

let our voices collide one more time--everything go back to how 
it used to be--i’m getting older than i wanna be   
TV’s sedating me 
i’m never gonna fucking see 
the world crashing down around me 

you’re not making sense, ingesting ten more pills 
i’ve got a heavy, sinking feeling in my chest 
gonna play some cheap thrills, pretend everything’s fine 
till my heart falls out, i hate you and i whine 
time keeps slipping by and all i do is sit 
talking doesn’t work--i’m not gonna make it 
the sun’s between my legs--i don’t want him to break dawn 
let me sleep till my body’s gone.