i'm the one to blame


I smile and laugh wildly, having fun with my friends

They don’t know what a huge lie, i have to pretend

To my friends I’m the funniest girl who’s so full of life

But they don’t know how many times, I’ve held a bloody knife


To them I’m the girl, who loves to strut down the street,

Yet they don’t even know that I feel so incomplete

To my friends my laughter can spread,

They don’t know, inside my happiness is dead

To my friends my smile can brighten up their day

They don’t know that I’ve shut my feelings away


I’m locked in a prison, one I can’t escape

A place where my sole is constantly raped

In my prison there is no love or spark,

All alone, tired, desperate and left in the dark


In the dark there is this monster in the dark waiting for the kill

The danger sends out terrifying chill

I’ve faced this monster before, it’s dressed in disguise

My spirit breaks down further, slowly releasing its cries



I have had enough so I bring out my knife

Piecing my skin figuring out how to end my life


I know it’s nobody’s fault; I’m the one to blame

After all I’m the one causing myself the pain
















  • Author: queen DT (Pseudonym) (Offline Offline)
  • Published: November 4th, 2017 16:54
  • Comment from author about the poem: this is based on a true story to help others reflec on the truth of depresion
  • Category: Sad
  • Views: 30
  • User favorite of this poem: Saima.


  • olivergreenwood19

    This is very deep and very dark but unfortunately I can relate. You depicted the feeling and condition perfectly and the entire piece was beautiful and moving. Many people never understand what its like, and for those who don't I would encourage them to read this!

    • dtyrrell145

      thank you for understanding, since i have started poetry so many people have shown me more than enough respect, it has made me feel slightly better getting to know similar people.
      I just want to make something of myself through poetry so i have someone to relate to and get through the pain together x

    • Saima

      This is absolutely beautiful, the complete truth of depression, you're writing is so deep. Please continue writing more poems, I understand how you feel as well, having to act like everything ok, and everyone thinks you're alright but you put a mask on to hide the way you really feel. You can always open up to me about anything if you feel like talking x also you should read my poems I think you'd enjoy reading them and you'd relate x

      • dtyrrell145

        thankyou so much for understanding, i will check your poetry out now x

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