Death of a Friend

you said your time is short.

your not getting better.

i live in denial.

i prayed for you,

but i need to pray more.

i have a second chance to pray to god and to pray to mary...

to heal your condition.

i finally have a second chance to do it right,

because i regret not praying more for my mom...

but with you,

my best friend...

god has given me another chance.

i dont want to say it,

i dont want to accept it,

i just want to live in denial...

of the death of a friend,

first my mom and now you?

both with blood issues.

you said it will slowly shut down each organ...

each nerve...

one..

by..

one...

it kills me to think of you leaving me...

forever...

you tried saying goodbye,

but i just cant say goodbye.

i want to talk to you til the very last second...

even then i still wont be able to say goodbye.

take me with you.

i dont want to see you suffer,

i dont want to experience the death of a friend.

your not my friend,

your my best friend.

your not the one that i love,

your the one that i would die for.

your not the one that gets stuck in my head,

your the one who still lives in my heart...

come home...

come back...

even if its to see you just one last time.

people say to let you go,

people remind me of your shit,

but those people dont know you like i do,

and those people dont even know the definition of a second chance.

your getting weaker...

and weaker each day.

your running low on energy.

im not looking forward to the day...

you slip away..

you want me to sing at your funeral,

but im hoping i dont have to,

but if the day comes...

i want you to tell me now whats your #1 song,

and ill sing it,

along with some of my own choices.

but you gotta come home.

i cant tolerate it.

i could never deal with the fact that the possibility of the day coming will happen over 3600 miles away.

ive been through this once with my mom...

i know exactly whats going on,

and i know exactly how its going to happen.

the death of my mother is becoming very similar...

to the death of my best friend...