Everything I$ Not Replaceable ........ Including Me.

There are many people that rely on me

For their reliability

That's a helluva lot of folks

I know if I say tonight

That I am to tired to work

I know I am going to get it from both sides

Nobody is going to understand

Or

Care that I am to tired

I am very aware of this flaw

I just want some freedom

From some where

Where I never have to ever feel

Those types of pressures

Again

Every night in this filthy ass place

I call

A dressing room

I rehearse my tired lines

Though

Over these years

I have wasted away mentally

To almost nothing

Try and pretend your happy

When you have a loaded 45

Pointed at your temple

In tears running down your face

Like a ripple from a wave

Inside I am screaming for help

But the sound

That comes out my mouth

Isn't audible

Like screaming without a voice

I am fighting off demons

That can appear

At any moment

Why shall I just die in vein

When I have that

Zhuh Nuh Say Kwah

About me

That's that little something special

About me did you know

I can never dis-value this big

Wonderful world

But dammit

I can kill them all

For mistreating me

How pathetic its is

The hurt

The dis-value

The ugliness

I hate them yes

But I hate me more for

Feeling like this

I have no more excuses

They don't know mentally I am dead

 my ghost is holding on to my

Career not me

I have talked to my oppressors

About my alleged suicide

Attempt

They let me know that not only

Are they not going to suffer

For my foolishness

But they will feel relief

For my soul

I hate the selfish bastards

I have every intention

Of not ever speaking to them

In life if I live

Those selfish reasons

I can't take any damn more

They destroy everything about me

Everyone

And everything is not replaceable

So be careful what you break

Or whom you hurt

You go your way I go mines

I am having as little to do

With human beings

As possible

In some weird way

I am at peace with this