B of E #13: learning to twirl

well
I don't think I was such a bad husband
not really
no worse than the rest
that much is sure
probably the dancing
gave a clue

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pardon?
oh sorry
I was just thinking a minute

 

you know none of the boys
that I grew up with
could dance

 

it's funny
my mother and my sister
both tried their damnedest to teach me
to waltz and fox-trot and what-have-you
they loved being able to dance
and my mother told me
it would be important to me in my life
but I'd have none of that
felt there was something embarrassing about it

 

we sort of danced when we were courting
cramped floors where we mostly clung
for dear life
like a pair of startled bunnies
and because being so close
felt pretty wonderful
but after we married
not really

 

sometimes we'd be somewhere
with a band playing
and she'd say let's dance
not necessarily waltz
often it was the modern all-arms-and-legs stuff
but I couldn't do it
unless I'd had a skinful

 

I changed you know
made a decision sometime or other
that I'd do it
get up and dance no matter how silly I felt
was too late though and she wasn't interested anymore
I think I'd broken her of any desire
and looking back
we were probably already buggered by then anyway
waiting for the last rites

 

I think
at least I wonder sometimes
if me not dancing had something to do with it
maybe that was enough
in a way
to make me a bad husband
to mark me

 

still
it's history now
isn't it

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.

 

would you care for a twirl?

 

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