I'm not trying to be hard I'm emotionally scared
From the moment that I got up
Someone's simple mistake pissed off
Okay it was because the oven was left on over night
But the annoyance inside was very intense
I'm currently boarding two dogs so need to get them out early
Searching for car keys and I just can't find them
Have to go wake up my lady to see if she knows, of course they were more than under my nose, where I'd already checked and thought "it's not those."
Finally I'm off to walk with the rising sun
Beautiful landscape all around me, get through some woods and have hills on one side and the sea on the other.
When one of the temporary dogs (wannabe top bitch) runs straight into mine not giving a toss, he yelped and moved didn't know where to go
I felt that anger build inside because it was more than just rude but again this is just what dogs do, really it just made him jump so the noise was of surprise too.
Then my first job another that's completely nuts, does not like boundaries or having to wait and it nips me everytime I take the lead. Today when it happened, within the moment it bit! my other hand grab the scruff "this time your surrendering, I don't give a s***" I held on calm (ish) and in about a minute it gave up, I can tell you it felt like longer when in the moment but after we then had a lovely walk.
Now I could so much anger inside, partly wanted to cry or maybe just smash everything I came across.
Then to meet up with someone I know and halfway through a discussion my passion explodes, I can't agree to disagree or let us both believe what we do. No I'm annoyed and want to let this anger loose, luckily this was brought up and I apologise for sounding passive aggressive. Only time will tell if I get forgiveness, as there was no justification how I said my sentence.
Now the on my way home thinking maybe I should get some food, being hungry never helps the mood. I go to cross a road and taxi starts to move, I say go ahead but so does he, before you know it I'm dancing tango in the high street. He shakes his head looking straight at me with that pissed off expression. Me being me, opened my mouth I'll just let some words out "I think you need to change job buddy" of course he ask me to repeat, of that I did and got the f you f off, I smile and say you should try it too and have a wonderful day.
Back home and I'm done, my mask drops off. The tears start to fall from what feels like a breaking dam, my mind is racing angry at so many things it becomes a whirlpool and any next thought is being sucked in, I'm now getting annoyed at the vegetables growing asking for my attention but need to feed the dogs and put some washing on, then wash up.
Right! this bad energy is going to be released in these tasks but yet I'm angry so I got given a gift once all done, dog piss to clean up on the kitchen floor.
The clock now say 01:11 after writing this I can see what I felt, to hate everything this much means I hate my self this much as well. I know this is true because it hurts and tears full too, that if nothing anyone ever does is good enough then I'll never be too.
With my words I Manifest my inner and outer world
Knowing my subconscious is listing changing the prospective I once held
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Author:
Poetic Dan (
Offline) - Published: July 5th, 2018 09:18
- Comment from author about the poem: I think this is the most I've ever posted, still I'm unsure if it will read well.
- Category: Unclassified
- Views: 42
Offline)
Comments3
Sometimes we say things we don't really mean. Maybe the day is just going bad and we hold in anger and it comes out misplaced. I know I am guilty. Words once reaching the air can never be brought back. Great write.
That is so true, thank you so much for helping some of my misplaced guilt.
Dan this is an amazing piece recounting a day in the life. A day in the life of one man like no other man on this planet - unique!
So very easy to relate to (which also means very well written) and so naturally expressed.
I'm commenting upon your style of conveying here. This was really gripping and entertaining. I haven't seen you write like this before
I would like to see more in this style sir.
Very impressed.. more please.
Wow, you've really help me with your words my friend. I was so unsure about writing or posting this but could feel a strong desire too.
I still feel I'm not worthy of this praise but this is my biggest step to truly see my own self worth and abilities.
You've seen through to my soul, thank you again
Self doubt eh? Don't go there. This style of writing is fresh and lively, quite different to anything else on here. Its yours and original. Really good! I mean what i wrote and i'm commenting again to underline what i said. Be confident!
To be honest i'm in dry spot at the moment and not writing but reading this piece of yours encourages me to do something along along the lines of your piece when i do start again - maybe, i'll have to wait and see.
In our lives we often have days where we wish we had never bothered to get up but the days that are wonderful are much more numerous than the bad ones. You have got through the bad day, the good ones await.
Thank so much for understanding, the positive words have helped balance my mind.
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