'promise me daddy,
promise you'll come home'
four year old lips
speak of memories
mummys hugs and kisses
tickles and ginger bread men
softness, comfort, love
girly things daddy doesn't do
gone now, missed
lost into that dark shadow
where tears call out
and daddy's hugs
dont bring mummy back
from that shiney box
she went to heaven in
daddy says mummy wanted to
she always wanted to
to come home
to the little girl she loved
the little girl who made her smile
and filled her with joy
made her life into
a new and happy girly place
where she was very very happy
but one night
she couldn't come home
nice doctors were mending her
because she got broken in a car
a devil called drink
was inside a lady driving home
and the devil hurt mummy
but they couldn't fix her
and she can't come home anymore
'i promise you,
my sweet darling baby girl
daddy always comes home
daddy will always come home'
-
Author:
dusk arising (
Offline) - Published: July 11th, 2018 08:26
- Category: Unclassified
- Views: 77
- Users favorite of this poem: Poetic Dan, AmandaJade
Offline)
Comments15
Not sure where this came from and if this is your own experience. You hit a nerve with this and I thank you for expressing it my friend, helping heal this inner pain. If you have any I that it can reflect back
Hi Dan. Thanks for commenting. Its not a part of my past but was designed to painfully drive home how drink driving wrecks lives. I'm not sure how it spoke to you but if something good or theraputic came thru it pleases me.
Such a sad write. Daddy stay home!
Drunk driving destroys lives! Great poem penned here dusk arising!
Thank you for reading and your appreciation sir.
dusk,
A heart wrenching piece of writing!
Many tears have been shed in my family for the loss of a life because of a head on collision due to drunk driving! He was 21 years old!
~Laura~
I am so sorry to have touched upon your loss with my piece today. I know you will be in support of the message behind my writing here and i humbly thank you for your comments.
I’m honestly at loss of words. Its such a sad piece of work but the message behind it is so important. Topic aside, the way you carried out the story was perfect, it really kept me on my toes.
Thank you so much Reyas. I tried to keep this piece in childish language to relax my reader into soft kiddies world whilst delivering an awful punchy message. It is upsetting and sad, but thats how life can be.
Thank you for commenting.
So so so beautifully written, reminds me of my uncle who couldn't come home... all the love.
Thank you for reading and your kind comment. I'm sorry for having reminded you of your loss.
So sad yet such a good poem, I loved it
Thank you for commenting, i hope in some way someone may not drink drive tonite..
Amazing write this really spoke to me
Thank you, i tried to write an especially touching piece for this message to carry.. Though my words are fiction, somewhere there are little girls with no mum or dad because of drink driving.
Such an emotive write da, one day we may all learn that drinking and driving is a complete no, no.
This is me being political and hitting where it hurts. I strongly avoid drink driving.
Oh nooh, such a touching poem written so movingly on behalf of an orphaned kid. So poetic and appealing. Thumbs up.
Pleez do write your thoughts/comment under my newest poem too , titled , O human heart"l, I like meeting poem pals to say hi.
The message within this piece is about drink driving and how it damages innocent peoples lives. Thank you for reading and commenting.
Oh I see, had to reread it, it\'s great and honest and heartwarming that you exposed the harms of drink-driving, I have quite a few poems against the demons drink so I appreciate your perspective and thoughts on it! Do take care.
And you say I cut straight to it.. Wow dusk.. This is so powerful. The subject matter is extremely well handled, these sorts of writes can often become tight rope writes, brilliant work. Again..powerful.
Thanks Ed. Here i am on my political soap box and purposely hitting painfully low to make my point of view hurt the reader.
Its sickening what drink driving can do to the lives of innocents quite apart from the perp having to live with their conscience thereafter.
Thanks Ed. Here i am on my political soap box and purposely hitting painfully low to make my point of view hurt the reader.
Its sickening what drink driving can do to the lives of innocents quite apart from the perp having to live with their conscience thereafter.
This is really powerful, and can be translated in many ways. I love the way the writing is used in a way that it feels as if the girl is explaining what had happened. Excited to see some more writings from you.
This is very touching but a great poem
An emotionally charged poem indeed, made even more so by virtue of the fact it is clearly about a child's significant, tragic and otherwise unexpected loss, furthermore, the impact is accentuated by the narrative appearing to be expressed by the bereaved child's daddy...... Neville
Drunk driving it does destroy lives and really good/sad poem.
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