Maybe it's better to stay hidden
Maybe my walls keep me safe
Maybe sad is better
Than going past my front gate
Maybe I should just stay here
Where I know I'm okay
Maybe being locked away is better
Maybe it'll start to feel better
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Author:
Naeners (
Offline) - Published: July 17th, 2018 11:05
- Comment from author about the poem: Please tell me what you think. Constructive criticism is always welcomed.
- Category: Unclassified
- Views: 15
Offline)
Comments2
I think that the structure of this is very good but the idea of staying locked away is so very sad, you are young and in my many years of living I know that the world outside is a wondrous place to explore. Life is outside of the box that you seem to want to stay in. Go ahead and open the door.
This piece is very well written. I like concise works, such as yours, for they are more powerful and thought provoking. Each reader will form their own mental picture so lengthy detailed work becomes unnecessary.
Staying behind the gate to produce work of such excellence is to be applauded. However, venturing out into our beautiful world is encouraged, if only for the purpose of expanding ones experiences and therefore provide more scope for future writings.
Excellent - more please.
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