Comments received on poems by char
descriptions | funeral
camille said:
Dark and soulful. Really great writing style.
July 1st, 2016 11:12
camille said:
Dark and soulful. Really great writing style.
July 1st, 2016 11:12
descriptions | funeral
BRIAN & ANGELA said:
Thanks CHAR ~ all of life is an experiential journey and it is the sum and remembrances of those experiences that makes us who and what we are today. So what about death ? I'm much too young to die but friends of mine have died much younger than I am now ! They live on in my memory ~ do I live on in theirs ~ post mortem ? Life has too many memories for us just to die into oblivion. For me life after death is an inevitable extension of being human but each of us has to figure out how and where we will spend eternity ! Thanks for sharing ~ love your style ~ BRIAN
July 1st, 2016 08:20
BRIAN & ANGELA said:
Thanks CHAR ~ all of life is an experiential journey and it is the sum and remembrances of those experiences that makes us who and what we are today. So what about death ? I'm much too young to die but friends of mine have died much younger than I am now ! They live on in my memory ~ do I live on in theirs ~ post mortem ? Life has too many memories for us just to die into oblivion. For me life after death is an inevitable extension of being human but each of us has to figure out how and where we will spend eternity ! Thanks for sharing ~ love your style ~ BRIAN
July 1st, 2016 08:20
descriptions | funeral
Daniel said:
Everyone writes in the style that feels natural to themselves, and therefore shows glimpses of that person (at least that's what I believe) I love the way you write, they are like beautifully written short stories, albeit quite dark. I love the way you write!
July 1st, 2016 04:56
Daniel said:
Everyone writes in the style that feels natural to themselves, and therefore shows glimpses of that person (at least that's what I believe) I love the way you write, they are like beautifully written short stories, albeit quite dark. I love the way you write!
July 1st, 2016 04:56
legends | colour-blind
Daniel said:
What an amazing picture you paint with your words. You have a rare talent telling a story, and allowing the reader to see through your words.
June 30th, 2016 04:21
Daniel said:
What an amazing picture you paint with your words. You have a rare talent telling a story, and allowing the reader to see through your words.
June 30th, 2016 04:21
descriptions | schizophrenia
Daniel said:
A harrowing and poignant poem beautifully written!
June 28th, 2016 08:23
Daniel said:
A harrowing and poignant poem beautifully written!
June 28th, 2016 08:23
descriptions | schizophrenia
BRIAN & ANGELA said:
HI CHAR ~ Thanks for posting ! I know where it came from your awesome imagination ! We all "scream at the Moon" some nights because the Lunar Forces control our emotions and turn us into Luna-tics ! Many things make us wish to die and the fact that smoking is still legal is one of them ! I too have encountered may MOONSTERS but when I have reached out to grapple with them ~ they are ephemeral and fade away transientl;y. That's the trouble with Moonsters they are real enough to scare the scat out of us but not real enough to confront. I hate Moonsters. (We always call them Moonsters makes them seem less frightening !). YES we are alone (empty chairs & empty tables) ~ scattered branches ~ a broken wall ~ a desicrated book ~ a cheap light ~ smashed windows - decaying wood and rusted nails ! I love all this imagery because it strikes a chord with me and my Moonsters are always multifaceted ! Love the "head in the sand" ending ~ If I close my eyes tight enough ~ it can''t see me ! Thanks for posting I enjoyed it and am still digesting it. I hope you get some more comments ~ it merits some. Keep writing ~ You are awesome. Love your writing ~ Love you too BRIAN
June 28th, 2016 06:03
BRIAN & ANGELA said:
HI CHAR ~ Thanks for posting ! I know where it came from your awesome imagination ! We all "scream at the Moon" some nights because the Lunar Forces control our emotions and turn us into Luna-tics ! Many things make us wish to die and the fact that smoking is still legal is one of them ! I too have encountered may MOONSTERS but when I have reached out to grapple with them ~ they are ephemeral and fade away transientl;y. That's the trouble with Moonsters they are real enough to scare the scat out of us but not real enough to confront. I hate Moonsters. (We always call them Moonsters makes them seem less frightening !). YES we are alone (empty chairs & empty tables) ~ scattered branches ~ a broken wall ~ a desicrated book ~ a cheap light ~ smashed windows - decaying wood and rusted nails ! I love all this imagery because it strikes a chord with me and my Moonsters are always multifaceted ! Love the "head in the sand" ending ~ If I close my eyes tight enough ~ it can''t see me ! Thanks for posting I enjoyed it and am still digesting it. I hope you get some more comments ~ it merits some. Keep writing ~ You are awesome. Love your writing ~ Love you too BRIAN
June 28th, 2016 06:03
legends | sunshine
lysistrata said:
A dark haired teenager called CHAR
Dreams in a narrow concrete flat.
Mute memories on the wall
Ambient melodies on the floor.
She does not want the honours of Mrs Preppy
Only the sunshine,companion to her verses.
Keep writing.... 📖
June 27th, 2016 07:28
lysistrata said:
A dark haired teenager called CHAR
Dreams in a narrow concrete flat.
Mute memories on the wall
Ambient melodies on the floor.
She does not want the honours of Mrs Preppy
Only the sunshine,companion to her verses.
Keep writing.... 📖
June 27th, 2016 07:28
legends | sunshine
BRIAN & ANGELA said:
THANKS CHAR ~ Love all your poems because they are so so original and iconoclastic. The trouble with Teachers is they are all at least one generation removed from their students ~ how can they ever hope to understand us ? They are clones of our parents and g-parents. Just like my friend Charlotte (who always insists on CHAR ~ pronounced SHAH) Mothers feel they have a Divine right to name us ~ we have a Devilish right to disown and change it ! The world is full of PREPPIES ~ it's illegal to kill them (even in the USA) so just ignore them I love you attitude to everything ~ keep posting and I'll keep commenting ! Your Friend BRIAN
June 27th, 2016 05:36
BRIAN & ANGELA said:
THANKS CHAR ~ Love all your poems because they are so so original and iconoclastic. The trouble with Teachers is they are all at least one generation removed from their students ~ how can they ever hope to understand us ? They are clones of our parents and g-parents. Just like my friend Charlotte (who always insists on CHAR ~ pronounced SHAH) Mothers feel they have a Divine right to name us ~ we have a Devilish right to disown and change it ! The world is full of PREPPIES ~ it's illegal to kill them (even in the USA) so just ignore them I love you attitude to everything ~ keep posting and I'll keep commenting ! Your Friend BRIAN
June 27th, 2016 05:36
pronouns | they
lysistrata said:
My 7 year old son convinced his best friend to steal his mum's golden earrings and exchange them with some of my son's car models. Then he stole a gift box from me and was getting ready to give them as his gift for Mother's Day. Soon enough the other mother discovered that she had a stupid easy manipulated son (her words!) and I was raising a dangerous son, whose mind was capable of deception.
I know who my son WAS at the age of 7, but I think, He has changed several times since then....
So you are right.Beautiful people on the outside could cause destruction,the same way damaged people on the inside could be transformed and create something beautiful.
June 26th, 2016 15:24
lysistrata said:
My 7 year old son convinced his best friend to steal his mum's golden earrings and exchange them with some of my son's car models. Then he stole a gift box from me and was getting ready to give them as his gift for Mother's Day. Soon enough the other mother discovered that she had a stupid easy manipulated son (her words!) and I was raising a dangerous son, whose mind was capable of deception.
I know who my son WAS at the age of 7, but I think, He has changed several times since then....
So you are right.Beautiful people on the outside could cause destruction,the same way damaged people on the inside could be transformed and create something beautiful.
June 26th, 2016 15:24
pronouns | they
BRIAN & ANGELA said:
THANKS CHAR ~ For being YOU a confident individual ~ who earns her own self respect. There is a MAXIM which says "Don't let this WORLD press you into its own mould but be transformed by renewing your mind every day. Your challenging second poem shouts that message. Teachers have their expectations of how we should conform according to age and gender BARBIE DOLLS for Girls and ACTION MEN for Boys. Sometimes they are so blinkered that they see a GIRL who paints a SUNFLOWER instead of BARBIE as rebellious rather than creative and individualistic. Creativity and Individuality should be cultivated and not suppressed ! The LGBT Movement has had to fight this for years but has now found its voice in many countries ! I love your sense of self worth and self esteem and your "struggle" to be who YOU WANT TO BE and your refusal to sqeezed into their preconceived mould. If ever I have a DAUGHTER ~ I want her to be just like you. Thanks for sharing and caring ~ Your Friend BRIAN
June 26th, 2016 03:42
BRIAN & ANGELA said:
THANKS CHAR ~ For being YOU a confident individual ~ who earns her own self respect. There is a MAXIM which says "Don't let this WORLD press you into its own mould but be transformed by renewing your mind every day. Your challenging second poem shouts that message. Teachers have their expectations of how we should conform according to age and gender BARBIE DOLLS for Girls and ACTION MEN for Boys. Sometimes they are so blinkered that they see a GIRL who paints a SUNFLOWER instead of BARBIE as rebellious rather than creative and individualistic. Creativity and Individuality should be cultivated and not suppressed ! The LGBT Movement has had to fight this for years but has now found its voice in many countries ! I love your sense of self worth and self esteem and your "struggle" to be who YOU WANT TO BE and your refusal to sqeezed into their preconceived mould. If ever I have a DAUGHTER ~ I want her to be just like you. Thanks for sharing and caring ~ Your Friend BRIAN
June 26th, 2016 03:42
colours | white
lysistrata said:
First of all you look more like a18 year old poet,but feedback should be important even to 64 year old writers and poets (it's just that they are gone blind and deaf).
I object to "many melancholy weeks pass and it’s the colour of her skin at the funeral you weren’t...."
He killed her and all that he feels is melancholy?!
Also Death to Him comes as a Healer,so could you imagine Death as a (white) Ghost? Altogether I like your experiment and looking forward to more 📖📓
June 25th, 2016 13:07
lysistrata said:
First of all you look more like a18 year old poet,but feedback should be important even to 64 year old writers and poets (it's just that they are gone blind and deaf).
I object to "many melancholy weeks pass and it’s the colour of her skin at the funeral you weren’t...."
He killed her and all that he feels is melancholy?!
Also Death to Him comes as a Healer,so could you imagine Death as a (white) Ghost? Altogether I like your experiment and looking forward to more 📖📓
June 25th, 2016 13:07
colours | white
BRIAN & ANGELA said:
WELCOME CHAR ~ Love SF it is an exciting and vibrant City ! Thanks for your first contribution to MPS a very poignant and powerful story of White in Life & Death. It had me gripped from IT'S through to WAITING. Your ability to NOT use the colour WHITE in the story is very clever ! I kept hearing it ~ but (of course) never seeing it. I could empathise because it is written from a Male perspective. The lesson is THINK before you DRINK ! You covered 49 momentous years (from birth to death) in just eight very pithy paragraphs. A perfect short story ~ thanks for sharing ~ more please ! Yours BRIAN (UK 33).
June 25th, 2016 02:28
BRIAN & ANGELA said:
WELCOME CHAR ~ Love SF it is an exciting and vibrant City ! Thanks for your first contribution to MPS a very poignant and powerful story of White in Life & Death. It had me gripped from IT'S through to WAITING. Your ability to NOT use the colour WHITE in the story is very clever ! I kept hearing it ~ but (of course) never seeing it. I could empathise because it is written from a Male perspective. The lesson is THINK before you DRINK ! You covered 49 momentous years (from birth to death) in just eight very pithy paragraphs. A perfect short story ~ thanks for sharing ~ more please ! Yours BRIAN (UK 33).
June 25th, 2016 02:28
