Comments received on poems by daniel dawes
Silent Moon
Ternic73 said:
beautiful, I close my eyes and see myself. I really like this poem
August 24th, 2016 08:42
Ternic73 said:
beautiful, I close my eyes and see myself. I really like this poem
August 24th, 2016 08:42
Be a man.......
BRIAN & ANGELA said:
Thanks for sharing DAN ~ The world would be a much better place if all Men (me included) displayed our gentler and softer side. Why can't w be more like our Ladies ? Love ~ joy ~ peace ~ gentleness ~ kindness ~ purity ~ godliness ~ humility ~ self control. The Fruit of the Spirit is not just for YIN it's for YANG as well ! ~ BRIAN
August 24th, 2016 05:45
BRIAN & ANGELA said:
Thanks for sharing DAN ~ The world would be a much better place if all Men (me included) displayed our gentler and softer side. Why can't w be more like our Ladies ? Love ~ joy ~ peace ~ gentleness ~ kindness ~ purity ~ godliness ~ humility ~ self control. The Fruit of the Spirit is not just for YIN it's for YANG as well ! ~ BRIAN
August 24th, 2016 05:45
Alive, not kicking
lysistrata said:
Daniel,
Sorry about the typos: smartphone While driving...
If I may, I would suggest to change the whole 4th verse,because you have 2 lines starting with " With" .
So, I suggest :
"The sky breaths,
With a whispering wind,
On an ocean filled with memories/dreams,
And a sun that swims"
It's your call!🌞
August 23rd, 2016 12:26
lysistrata said:
Daniel,
Sorry about the typos: smartphone While driving...
If I may, I would suggest to change the whole 4th verse,because you have 2 lines starting with " With" .
So, I suggest :
"The sky breaths,
With a whispering wind,
On an ocean filled with memories/dreams,
And a sun that swims"
It's your call!🌞
August 23rd, 2016 12:26
Alive, not kicking
lysistrata said:
1st verse: Try change "singing" within resting/nesting (?!)
4th verse:Try doing the same within
"stars"?!
Another Poem about Stillness.
Are you meditating?
August 23rd, 2016 09:39
lysistrata said:
1st verse: Try change "singing" within resting/nesting (?!)
4th verse:Try doing the same within
"stars"?!
Another Poem about Stillness.
Are you meditating?
August 23rd, 2016 09:39
Invitation
lysistrata said:
There is something romantic and certainly English in your Poetry.
Reading this made me think of Shakespeare,Keats,the Brontes,Ali Smith ,even J.Winterson....
Do you believe that Nature has the power to heal?🌿🌳🍀🍁
August 22nd, 2016 08:20
lysistrata said:
There is something romantic and certainly English in your Poetry.
Reading this made me think of Shakespeare,Keats,the Brontes,Ali Smith ,even J.Winterson....
Do you believe that Nature has the power to heal?🌿🌳🍀🍁
August 22nd, 2016 08:20
The Hooks of Mind
lysistrata said:
Thanks for reading my poem,but before I push you into the river Dart(?!) ,Could you be kind enough to explain to this plain maid,why are you getting very similar closure with your previous poem:
"Silence is broken as I step only to fall back into which it came,
I sit,
I watch,
And fade away into the beautiful tranquil night."😕
August 21st, 2016 08:35
lysistrata said:
Thanks for reading my poem,but before I push you into the river Dart(?!) ,Could you be kind enough to explain to this plain maid,why are you getting very similar closure with your previous poem:
"Silence is broken as I step only to fall back into which it came,
I sit,
I watch,
And fade away into the beautiful tranquil night."😕
August 21st, 2016 08:35
Silent Moon
lysistrata said:
I sit,
I watch,
I am getting bored😕
Your first attempt was more interesting!😯
August 19th, 2016 08:31
lysistrata said:
I sit,
I watch,
I am getting bored😕
Your first attempt was more interesting!😯
August 19th, 2016 08:31
Secret Paths
BRIAN & ANGELA said:
WELCOME DANIEL ~ Thanks for an excellent heart searching first poem. For each one of us Life (and Love) is a series of OPEN DOORS through which we pass and we can never go back. We never know the nature of the DOOR ~ Life or Death ~ Love or Rejection ~ Pain or Pleasure ~ Sorrow or Joy. That's the Story of ~ that's the Glory of ~ your life and mine. Survival (at all costs) is the KEY. Thanks for caring ~ BRIAN
August 18th, 2016 04:49
BRIAN & ANGELA said:
WELCOME DANIEL ~ Thanks for an excellent heart searching first poem. For each one of us Life (and Love) is a series of OPEN DOORS through which we pass and we can never go back. We never know the nature of the DOOR ~ Life or Death ~ Love or Rejection ~ Pain or Pleasure ~ Sorrow or Joy. That's the Story of ~ that's the Glory of ~ your life and mine. Survival (at all costs) is the KEY. Thanks for caring ~ BRIAN
August 18th, 2016 04:49
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