Quantum Sufficit

"I only said this German plan
Had points," remarked the small, meek man.
"I merely said an extra wife
Might add variety to life.
Strange how a woman will resent
A hypothetic argument.
I didn't mean my reference
As personal, in any sense,
But she - aw, why talk, anyhow?
Look at me now!

"This eye. These bumps, here, on my head.
This battered face. I only said
The Germans seemed to be a race
Who had sane views of woman's place.
Who knew her value. As I spoke
I smiled, to show it was a joke,
A merry quip. Have they no sense
Of humor? Are they all as dense
As she? Will none of them allow -
Look at me now!

"I only said that in the end
This German movement might extend
To other lands. I mean to say,
I never meant it in the way
She took the words. It isn't fair!
Jam on my clothes! Egg in my hair!
(Who'd think that she could aim so straight?)
Those Teuton fools are tempting fate
To dream of more than one strong frau.
Look at me now!

"At breakfast time it all began,
Like that," explained the small, meek man.
"Look at me now! These Nazis might
Perceive a portent in my plight -
My humor scorned; egg in my hair -
If they could see her standing there,
A vengeful fury, angry-eyed,
Ere they would wish her multiplied
They'd think again, however tough.
One is enough."