What Worth.
Light
early greets day by dew massaging dawn.
Heat
boldly soothes lassitude's mood of forlorn.
Dusk
loves the blush sundown brings to a cheek.
Yet what
counteth greetings if thou need not me ?
Stars
exchange winks with moon on lake's face.
Breeze
strokes each leaf in Springtime's embrace.
Clouds
brew desire when a storm mounts the sea.
What tho'
meaneth wooing if thou court not me ?
Rain
showers refreshment on that which is dry
Mist
melts as attention warms unclearing sky
Earth
blooms with kissed mouths Flora to please
But what
worth all that bounty if thou kiss not me ?
-
Author:
Fay Slimm. (
Offline) - Published: May 2nd, 2019 04:35
- Comment from author about the poem: With gratitude for a phrase by the poet Shelley, which inspired the whole verse. - - - - - "if thou kiss not me " - - - - - -
- Category: Unclassified
- Views: 69
Offline)
Comments10
extremely well constructed and appealing whatever way one looks at it ....
I used to holiday at my friends place in the villa overlooking the bay in La Spezia where Shelley drowned ..... N
What a sad loss that drowning was to the world of poetry eh - thank you loads for the supportive comment dear Nev. .....
it was indeed a tragic and untimely loss.... the comment a pleasure to convey... N
Another beautiful piece, lovely archaic language and descriptive metaphor
Thanks Seren - - I like to use archaic when the subject calls for it - so pleased too that you enjoyed the metaphor.........
Just beautiful - keep writing dear Fay.
Ah - a bit of a challenge some days Michael and I try of late to have weekends sans writing but cant keep a poet down for long they say - thanks a load for your warm support.
I am having much the same problem and sometimes think I'm trying too hard. I started to write a poem a couple of weeks ago and somehow I wasn't happy with it. I kept revisiting it and playing around with it and ended up with culling many of the lines until I had a distillation of what I wanted it say. The result is a short poem of two stanzas (3 lines and 4 lines) but I have to say I am smugly pleased with the result despite all the discarded words and lines on the study floor. I'll post it tomorrow and it'll be interesting to see what others think of it.
Already looking forward to reading the cut-down version Mike and wish often that I could achieve the same........... too much a chatterbox is me I expect.
Just posted along with comments along the lines of my comment above.
A lovely write Fay.
Sincere thank yous dear Orchid.
But what
wisdom sprouteth from thy pen if we not read thee?
Enlightening tidbits of knowledge and widom, well penned and greatly appreciated. A lovely write. - Phil A.
Ooooh thou hast a flair for the archaic mine Sire and I thank thee - - delighted that you like the verse and its tidbits dear Phil.
Most appreciated this poetry,merit ten in the form of yester
Am honoured by your merit of my little offering dear Suresh - - so glad you like the language of yesteryear - - thank you for dropping by and for your grand comment.
THANKS FOR SHARING FAY ~ This is a masterpiece in both Structure & Substance ! Line 1 3 5 are monosyllabic & environmental ~ They are amplified by longer lines (2 4 6). Line 7 (bisyllabic) poses a Question ~ Yet what ~ Whay tho' ~ But what ! Line 8 questions the ardour in Lines (2 4 6) in each verse. Methinks the responses in Lines 8 are those of a Female regretting that the flowery words (2 4 6) did not lead to amorous acts ! In my experience Ladies take time to warm up (emotionally) but when they do the Libido of thoughtless Men has begun to wane ? With ANGELA I try to move at her pace ~ VIRGOS (which I am !) are very understanding LOVERS !
Blessings & Love
BRIAN & ANGELA 🧡🧡🧡🧡
I am blushing at your assessment of my verse in archaic dear Brian -and thank you for all the extra review you give to the piece - a fine and encouraging critique indeed. Merci beaucoup.
Beautiful write Fay
A pleasure to have your visit and comment my poet-friend - thank you so much and am pleased you enjoyed both the chosen subject and style .
Natures gifts covered with some super phrase work Reading your work Fay always gives me a new outlook on the subject matter you choose. It really is a most enjoyable learning experience. Thank you
It warms my heart to know my poetry helps you to see subjects in different ways dear poet-friend and am delighted too that you enjoy your visits and are moved to comment........ thank you so much.
Beautiful structure and words Fay.
To be able to comment and rate this poem, you must be registered. Register here or if you are already registered, login here.